As a parent, I often find myself grappling with various ideals that seem perfect in theory but become nearly impossible to implement in practice. One such notion was the idea of teaching my children the correct anatomical names for their body parts. My four-year-old refers to his penis as a “pee-pee,” and my two-year-old follows suit with her vagina.
Honestly, I’m quite impressionable as a parent. When another parent shares their rules, such as limiting juice intake to four ounces a day based on guidelines from the American Academy of Pediatrics, I instantly feel the pressure to comply. So, when my child requests a juice box and I’ve already deemed him “done” for the day, I often cave in, leading to an intake of eight or even ten ounces instead. It’s just how I navigate the parenting landscape.
I once read an insightful article about a mother who firmly believed in using anatomical terms. I thought, “What a brilliant approach!” Since I have no qualms about words like “penis” or “vagina,” I made a mental note to avoid any childish euphemisms when the time came. Another article I encountered argued that using playful names could instill shame regarding the body, and I bought into that idea completely. “I’m a body-positive parent! I don’t want my children to feel ashamed!” I told myself.
Experts like Dr. Simmons emphasize the importance of using accurate terminology: “It’s crucial to teach children correct names early on so they see you as a reliable source for sensitive topics.” This made me question whether I was undermining my future relationship with my son by allowing him to call his penis a “pee-pee.”
As the months passed, I continued to refer to his anatomy as a “pee-pee.” Eventually, I attempted to correct him by saying, “Actually, it’s called a ‘penis.’” But time slipped away, and it became clear that my efforts to introduce this terminology were falling flat. “What’s that called?” I’d quiz him, only to be met with a blank stare and an expression that read, “Seriously, Mom?”
I realized that our conversations about anatomy were infrequent, and although there’s a legitimate concern regarding children’s ability to label their body parts accurately—especially for discussions of potential abuse—I’ve taken steps to address this. I’ve had conversations about boundaries and emphasized that he is the only person allowed to touch his “pee-pee.” He reassured me, “Yes, Mommy, I know. No one is allowed to touch my pee-pee but me.”
So, in our household, we stick with the terms we’ve chosen. And in a world where a bottle is a “ba-ba” and a pacifier is a “binky,” does it truly matter? While it may seem like another parenting misstep, I believe it is perfectly fine for “penis” to join the ranks of words we use playfully.
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In summary, while I may not be using the anatomically correct terms in my home, I’m confident that the love and trust I build with my children will provide a strong foundation for future conversations about their bodies.
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