Recently, I received a voicemail from my youngest daughter’s principal. Generally, I know him as the person who works hard to keep the chaos of parent pick-up from turning into a mad dash. So, when I listened to the voicemail indicating there had been an incident at school, I was taken aback. While his tone didn’t seem overly urgent, getting a call from the principal still made me anxious, so I promptly returned the call.
Fortunately, the situation wasn’t a serious accident or a concern about masking or quarantine, as I initially feared. The principal was calling to inform me that my daughter had reported to the playground teacher that three boys were chasing her, attempting to corner her for a kiss. Rather than feeling angry, I was more shocked. My immediate thought was, especially in light of Covid concerns, absolutely not.
I understand they are just six years old, so it might seem trivial at first glance. However, it’s critical to note that when playing chase, all parties should be willing participants. Chasing someone to invade their personal space and try to kiss them is not a game. And yes, they are old enough to comprehend that concept. There is nothing acceptable about encroaching on another person’s personal space, and I was relieved the principal recognized this. He assured me that a conversation was held with the entire class, as well as individually with the boys involved.
Celebrating the Principal’s Approach
I feel it’s essential to acknowledge how well her principal managed this situation. If I had heard the phrase “boys will be boys,” I would’ve been ready to unleash my inner mama bear. I’ve always taught my daughters to defend their personal space and to respect others. Having spent years avoiding conflict when I felt uncomfortable, I understand the importance of setting boundaries. I refuse to let my daughters face the same challenges I did.
Will this become a humorous anecdote for her wedding someday? Perhaps, but I’m not in a laughing mood just yet. While many things have changed since my childhood, the outdated ‘boys will be boys’ excuse should have been left behind long ago. Children, regardless of gender, should not be allowed to invade others’ personal space as if it’s a childhood rite of passage. Just because they are young doesn’t mean their bodily autonomy isn’t significant.
Teaching Respect for Personal Space
Moreover, it’s equally vital to instill in our kids the importance of respecting others’ boundaries. My daughter, who was chased for a kiss, is an affectionate child. She embraces everyone she plays with. I often remind her that she needs to ask before hugging someone. Not everyone appreciates hugs, and especially in the era of Covid, it’s crucial to refrain from hugging strangers met at events like her sister’s soccer practice.
Some might think it’s odd that I encourage my six-year-old to seek permission before hugging, but it’s never too early to teach her about consent and personal space. She should always ask for permission rather than seek forgiveness after an uncomfortable encounter. I hope these lessons resonate with her as she learns to assert her own boundaries. This entire experience confirmed to me that she is absorbing these important lessons.
She felt uncomfortable and unwanted when those boys invaded her personal space. Her principal reassured her that she did the right thing by reporting it to the teacher. He emphasized that no one has the right to touch her body without her consent. That kind of affirmation is invaluable. Too often, such incidents are brushed aside, not because they lack importance, but due to limited resources in schools or daycares. When children are encouraged to voice their concerns and nothing is done, it invalidates their feelings. We witness this repeatedly with survivors of harassment or assault.
Children may be young, but that doesn’t mean their boundaries shouldn’t be respected. The sooner we help them understand this, the brighter our future will be. I’m grateful to have my daughter’s principal as an ally in this effort.
For more insights on parenting and boundaries, check out this related blog post. If you’re exploring pregnancy options, resources like this one on fertility insurance can be very helpful.
Summary
: This heartfelt note expresses gratitude to a principal for addressing a concerning incident involving personal space and consent among children. The author emphasizes the importance of teaching young kids about respect for boundaries and the significance of validating their feelings.
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