As a parent, when you observe your youngest child covering their ears at the sound of a loud guitar solo, some might instinctively lower the volume. However, my instinct is to reach for the camera.
For over seven years, I’ve honed this practice without facing much scrutiny. Yet recently, my little one, Buddy, has begun to call me out on it. One evening, as Buddy was enthusiastically tossing his dinner—pasta, beans, and strawberries—across the floor, my immediate reaction was to grab the camera. I snapped away, aiming for that perfect shot of food flying through the air, until a voice of reason interrupted me.
“Mom, maybe you should stop him from making a mess instead of taking pictures,” suggested my older child, Lily. A valid point.
I’m grateful for the gentle reminders to prioritize parenting over photography. It often makes me ponder what message I’m conveying to my children through my constant documentation. Worst-case scenario: they may grow up thinking that capturing the perfect photo is more important than experiencing the moment itself. I recall a specific incident when I forgot my camera at one of Lily’s ballet recitals. I grumbled to myself about missing the opportunity until she said, “Mom, I guess you will just have to watch me.” And she was right.
This leads me to reflect on the implications of being both a family historian and an active parent. After years of documenting their lives, can I truly be present in the moment without the urge to photograph it? Am I recording these memories for them, for myself, or does it even matter? Will all this chronicling someday lead to therapy sessions for my kids? Will they recognize my face without a camera in hand?
These are significant questions for any parent grappling with similar dilemmas. Personally, I’m willing to take these risks because I believe my intentions are genuine. I am gifting my children something valuable while fulfilling my own creative desires. I want them to know their lives and stories are worthy of celebration—the good, the bad, and the wonderfully chaotic.
When their adult lives become filled with responsibilities and stresses, I hope to share with them glimpses of their childhood as seen through my eyes. And perhaps, with a bit of luck, we’ll all look back and find joy in the memories of our journey as a family.
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In conclusion, the balance between documenting memories and living in the moment is a nuanced challenge for parents. While capturing life’s fleeting moments can be rewarding, it’s essential to remember the importance of presence in our children’s lives.
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