For many individuals, maintaining personal hygiene is a routine part of daily life. It becomes second nature; most don’t think twice about showering or combing their hair. Regular activities like brushing teeth twice a day, once in the morning and again before bed, are performed almost automatically. People generally take pride in their appearance, frequently changing their clothes, undergarments, and socks. When stepping outside, they present themselves as well-groomed individuals.
However, for those grappling with depression or other significant mental health disorders, these seemingly simple tasks can become overwhelming. Bathing may transform into an arduous chore. I understand this firsthand because I manage bipolar disorder, anxiety, and PTSD. On days when my symptoms flare up, even the most basic self-care feels insurmountable.
As I sit here, it’s been four days since my last shower. The odor clinging to my shirt resembles an Italian deli—meaty, oniony, and quite potent. My teeth? Well, let’s just say my toothbrush is still nestled in my travel bag from a weekend trip. I’ve neglected my hygiene to the point where my underwear feels uncomfortable, and I lack the energy to change.
Admittedly, this isn’t something I take pride in. I don’t think anyone dealing with a mental health issue would. It’s a continuous cycle of symptoms that I seldom discuss with my therapist or psychiatrist, but it is undeniably part of my reality.
According to an article on Healthline, “Many people find it challenging to perform basic hygiene tasks when experiencing depression.” This includes activities like showering, washing hands, or brushing teeth. The reasons behind this struggle are multifaceted, but as clinical psychologist Melissa A. Jones notes, it primarily stems from a lack of energy, motivation, and drive.
Jones elaborates, “People living with mental illness often report feeling too exhausted to engage in simple self-care tasks.” Diminished interest in activities plays a significant role in this struggle. Carla Manly, a clinical psychologist and author, shared insights from her clients who describe their experience with depression as being “trapped under a heavy weight” or feeling like they are constantly enveloped in a gray cloud. This perspective underscores how actions that mentally healthy individuals take for granted can be monumental tasks for those suffering from severe depression.
During depressive episodes, I often feel a sense of helplessness and despair, akin to treading water in an endless ocean. The sheer effort of existing drains me, and the thought of showering can feel unbearable. When I’m in this state, even the physical pain associated with mental illness can deter me from movement and personal care. Showers can feel like sharp stings, and I find myself apathetic—nothing seems to matter.
Thus, I often hide behind oversized coats and hoodies, hoping no one will notice that I’ve been wearing the same outfit. I wear masks when I venture outside, not just for protection against COVID but also to shield others from my unbrushed teeth. A hat covers my unwashed hair, allowing me to go unnoticed.
I’ve become quite adept at masking my struggles.
But even in the depths of depression, I remind myself that eventually, I will shower, change my clothes, and brush my teeth. I do this because I have experienced tougher times and have emerged on the other side. I know I can survive this. I have friends and family who support me, reminding me that even the smallest acts of self-care are significant. I matter, and I have a fantastic psychiatrist and therapist who recognize when I’m struggling, even if I don’t openly discuss my hygiene difficulties.
If you’re finding it hard to bathe today or your hair is tangled and your teeth unbrushed, know that you’re not a bad person or lazy. You’re facing a battle, experiencing pain, and there is help available. With time, mindfulness, therapy, and possibly medication, you can navigate through these challenges. Just reach out and ask for assistance.
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