When parents of young children lament about their kids rising with the sun and eagerly anticipate the day they can sleep in, I can relate. However, I often caution them against rushing through those years, as energetic toddlers in the early morning light are far preferable to the moody teenage “vampires” that follow.
During my sons’ childhood, they too were early birds—but thankfully, their mornings didn’t involve acrobatics right out of bed. The 6 a.m. wake-up call was tough, especially since I often burned the midnight oil on freelance assignments. To ease into the day, I relied on classic shows like Sesame Street and Mr. Rogers, alongside my mother-in-law’s gifts of SpongeBob SquarePants and Yu-Gi-Oh!—programs I never thought I’d enjoy but ended up relishing as I laughed along with my boys. On the rare occasions they overslept, I would tiptoe into their room, convinced something was amiss, just to check that they were still breathing.
Fast forward through the years, and my boys transitioned into teenagers, bringing with them a new wake-up dilemma. Now, I consider myself a self-proclaimed expert in the art of rousing a sleeping teen. After extensive “training,” here are some insights I’ve gathered:
What Not to Do:
- Remove Privileges: In moments of frustration, it’s tempting to assert authority by taking away privileges. However, remember that your teen years can feel interminable. Soon enough, they may respond with indifference, and you will too.
- Invest in Multiple Alarms: Teens excel at tuning out alarms, no matter how creative or annoying they might be. They can easily incorporate these sounds into their dreams, making them oblivious to wake-up calls.
- Deploy the Family Pet: While sending in the dog might seem like a good idea, it often backfires. A happy dog only makes them feel cozier, leading them to drift back into sleep.
Effective Strategies:
- Cook Something Tempting: Quietly enter their room, head to the kitchen, and whip up some bacon. The smell will naturally draw them out of slumber—no words needed.
- Irritate Them: This may seem counterintuitive, but find ways to annoy them. Pull up the blinds, flick on the lights, or cheerily greet them with a “Good morning!” Alternatively, if you live in a multi-story home, call their name from downstairs. This will likely prompt a frustrated response, yet it guarantees they’ll wake up—if only to argue.
- Send a Text: Despite their inability to hear alarms, they often respond to text notifications. They are of a generation that has been rewired. Offer an enticing treat, like a trip to Subway, because it turns out that even vampire-like teens will rise for a sandwich.
- Cartoons as a Last Resort: If all else fails, turn on some classic cartoons. They secretly long for those simpler times and may be lured from their dreams when reminded of their beloved shows.
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In summary, waking a teenager requires a blend of strategy, patience, and a little creativity. By avoiding common pitfalls and employing effective methods, you can navigate this challenging task with relative ease.
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