It has arrived. Aside from my role as a human vending machine, my tweens now deem me decidedly uncool. I was warned about this inevitable phase by other parents, though I secretly hoped to escape unscathed. However, nothing truly prepares you for the moment when your children openly express their embarrassment toward you.
I recall the days when my children clung to me, finding comfort only in their mother’s presence. Those days are long gone. Nowadays, a simple text message from a friend suffices.
When I must step foot into their school—a traumatic event in their minds—I receive an extensive list of instructions:
- Please don’t speak to anyone.
- Avoid making eye contact.
- Do not engage with my teacher.
- Under no circumstances should you hug or kiss me.
- Please don’t introduce yourself to my classmates.
- Don’t bring my lunch late.
- Absolutely do not chat with my friends.
- Refrain from talking to other parents.
Oh, how the tables have turned! It wasn’t long ago that I was their number one fan, asked to volunteer in class every day, bring goodies for special occasions, lead math groups, accompany them on field trips, show off our new kittens during show-and-tell, and share hugs and kisses as we approached their classrooms. Those were the glory days of parental popularity.
I have to admit, I am guilty of some of the “DON’Ts” listed above. Yes, I’m the mom who waves enthusiastically and shouts, “I love you!” from the car window during drop-off. I’m the one cranking up Taylor Swift’s “Shake It Off” a bit too loudly during pick-up time. I even make surprise visits to their classrooms just to wave hello, and I often greet them with an overly loud laugh as they leave school. And yes, I may show up in old yoga pants and a messy ponytail.
It became painfully clear how much discomfort I was causing them when I began to witness eye rolls, quiet muttering, and the avoidance of eye contact. The moment that stung the most was when my son pretended not to recognize me, prompting his teacher to ask who I was.
My choice of discussion topics hasn’t helped either. For example, while waiting in line at a school function with my daughter, I mentioned how a stylist suggested I should consider waxing my arm hair. I caught her glancing uneasily at the exit as she subtly moved away from me, saying, “Mom, can we please NOT talk about your arm hair at school?”
Maybe their embarrassment is justified, but I still hold on to the notion that children should run to their parents for hugs and affection, regardless of age. Unfortunately, that’s not the case anymore.
I remain hopeful that this phase will pass and that one day, they will return to their senses. At least, that’s the optimistic narrative I’m crafting.
In a refreshing twist, I experienced a brief moment of redemption today. My son unexpectedly gave me a sweet kiss on the cheek as he said goodbye right outside the school—without any prompting from me! Plus, my daughter offered a hug as she exited the car. Could there be a glimmer of hope for this mom, whose arm hair is perhaps too prominent after all?
For more insights on family dynamics and related topics, visit this informative blog. They also provide excellent resources on home insemination at this link. If you’re curious about pregnancy and family planning, check out the CDC’s resource for trustworthy information.
Summary
Parenting can bring unexpected challenges, particularly when it comes to navigating the changing perceptions of tweens. While moments of embarrassment are common, there can still be instances of affection and connection that remind parents they are loved, even when their children may not show it outright.
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