5 Ways to Embarrass Your Teen Just by Being You

Insert eye roll here

It doesn’t matter how trendy or in-touch you think you are; your teen will find something to roll their eyes at.

By Alex Thompson
Updated: Feb. 20, 2024
Originally Published: March 21, 2022

I like to think of myself as a pretty cool mom. I stay current with the latest slang and fashion trends, and I’m always open to discussing anything with my teens—whether it’s relationships, substance use, or why they might need a special razor for their private areas.

I remember how my own parents used to embarrass me with their old-fashioned ways, and I never thought my kids would feel the same about me. I try to keep my conversations fresh and relevant; just the other day, I mentioned how someone at the store was acting “sus,” and my daughter was less than impressed. She flat-out told me to stop talking. Here are five surefire ways I’ve found to embarrass my teens simply by existing:

1. Yawning or Sneezing

Last week, my son lectured me about my yawning and sneezing habits. His exact words? “Mom, please try not to yawn. You yawn so loud it’s embarrassing. And your sneezing? Just don’t.” Apparently, I should hold in all signs of life, including my breathing and chewing, as my daughter won’t even sit next to me during meals due to the sounds I make while eating.

2. Showing Affection

Your kids need to know you love them, but they don’t want anyone, including their friends, to witness it. Public displays of affection are a no-go. A heartfelt hug or even a gentle touch can result in them pulling away. Texting is acceptable, but if you express concern over the phone, you might just get hung up on.

3. Walking Too Close

Never, I repeat, NEVER walk beside them in public. This applies to school, shopping malls, concerts, and even restaurants. On a recent back-to-school shopping trip, my oldest told me to stay away and just wait while he picked clothes. I swear, he and his siblings bolted from me like I was an alien! My attempts to take a selfie with a hat only resulted in a barrage of texts telling me to stop before I ruined their reputation.

4. Asking About Their Lives

I often get messages saying something like, “I’m not talking to my crush anymore, but don’t ask me any questions.” Kids want you to know things, but only on their terms. If you show even a hint of concern, you might get the classic hand gesture indicating they are done conversing.

5. Seeking Tech Support

Asking my kids for help with electronics is a guaranteed way to push their buttons. My youngest recently asked, “How can you be so unsmart?” for not knowing how to unzip a file. Meanwhile, they can create new words with ease! And let’s not forget about social media; you’re not allowed to post pictures of them looking great, but they can share whatever they want with their friends.

So, just a heads up: you will embarrass your teens no matter how cool you think you are. There’s no avoiding it. My advice? Live your life freely, even if your very breathing feels like a source of embarrassment to them.

However, here’s a little secret: this phase won’t last forever. My oldest is turning 19 soon, and he actually likes going out with me as long as I’m paying. My daughter, now 17, has eased up on how annoying my breathing is. Things are looking up!

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Summary:

Navigating the teenage years can be challenging, especially when it comes to balancing your need to show affection and support with their desire for independence. From simple actions like yawning and sneezing to the dreaded public displays of affection, parents often find themselves in embarrassing situations. However, these moments are part of the parenting journey, and the good news is that the embarrassment won’t last forever as relationships evolve.