Prior to my journey into motherhood, I held the naive belief that if I had a son, I could simply purchase multiple sets of one-size-fits-all overalls and generic dark onesies in bulk to meet his wardrobe needs. However, my experiences over the past 19 months have revealed that toddlers can be even more particular about their attire than a high-fashion magazine editor. I attribute this pickiness to my son’s father, as I am perfectly content in my standard mom outfit—yoga pants paired with any shirt devoid of buttons. Through my toddler’s guidance, I have identified five prominent styles that characterize toddler fashion:
- The Nudist: A number of toddlers revel in the liberating sensation of nudity. Were it not for the costly rental of a steam cleaner post-accident on the rug, I might fully support this clothing-free lifestyle. As my own garments frequently suffer the effects of toddler-related messes—often left to mildew in the washing machine or lay wrinkled on the floor—I have become an advocate for this style of freedom.
- The Fashionista: In our local park, there is a group of toddlers who embody the “Fedorable” essence, and I must admit, my son often stands at the forefront. A “Fedorable” is a toddler who wears a fedora, likely destined for a future in a trendy band. This style doesn’t strictly require a fedora, but it does mandate a chic clothing item—be it a faux fur vest, a twirly skirt, a designer tutu, TOMS shoes, or even deliberately torn $80 jeans.
- The Minimalist: For these toddlers, simplicity is key; they prioritize functionality and comfort above all. They have little patience for the myriad buttons on a patterned blouse paired with a trendy vest, and they find the nudist approach impractical when attempting to keep sand at bay during park outings. This is the child I envisioned when I invested in bulk overalls from Osh Kosh B’Gosh.
- The Costumer: Similar to the fashionista, this toddler has a penchant for dramatic flair, often at the expense of comfort. This child is unafraid to don an insulated astronaut costume for a grocery trip on a sweltering summer day or insist on wearing their finest leotard and tutu for a winter outing to the Nutcracker performance, showing little regard for the cold.
- The PJ-er: The PJ-er despises anything that isn’t made of flannel or lacks built-in footies. This style resonates deeply with me, as I still embrace it wholeheartedly. My dedication to wearing my cozy flannels and sleepy-time yoga pants has led to my fashionista child leading me to my closet, encouraging me to wear “real clothes.” I strongly suspect that my next child will happily lounge in their drool-stained pajamas alongside me all day, graciously declining any invitations that require leaving the house. Unfortunately, while the public pajama-wearing toddler is socially acceptable, the same cannot be said for their mothers; thus, I am striving to change this stigma one flannel PJ shirt and well-worn yoga pants day at a time.
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In summary, toddlers exhibit a variety of distinct styles that reflect their personalities and preferences, ranging from the liberating nudist to the fashionable costumer. Understanding these styles can help parents navigate the whimsical world of toddlerhood.
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