Setting
A home engulfed in disarray, with damp pool towels strewn about, an overflowing sink filled with dirty dishes, and a palpable air of chaos.
Characters
- Mia, wailing at the top of her lungs for reasons unknown.
- Leo, running around the house in the nude, chanting, “I have a big booty!”
- Jack, sporting multiple pairs of socks, attempting to glide across the family room floor.
- Enter the babysitter.
Leo screams, “No!”
Jack announces his urgent need for a bathroom break.
Mia stomps her way upstairs.
And just like that, pandemonium reigns.
Me
“Guess what?! Oh wait, you’ll never guess, so I’ll just spill the beans. It’s incredible! I just landed a book deal—a genuine book deal!”
Jack calls from the bathroom, “Mom! Hurry! I need you to wipe me!”
Leo curiously investigates his nostrils, extracting something and wiping it on my jeans as he strolls away.
Mia discovers her computer game has been switched off and declares me the worst mother alive.
Sitter
“Wow! That sounds amazing! What’s the book about?”
Jack interjects, “I don’t think you wiped me completely; I can feel poop in my tushy.”
Mia chimes in, “Did you hear me? I said you’re the meanest mom ever. Meaner than any of my friends’ parents. Meaner than Miss Hannigan. Meaner than a witch. Just so, so, so mean.”
A moment of awkward silence fills the room.
Me: “Um, parenting…”
Sitter: Stares blankly.
And just like that, the scene concludes.
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In summary, the chaos of parenting unfolds in a comical yet relatable scene, highlighting the unpredictability and challenges that come with it.
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