“I will ALWAYS work full-time! I’ll NEVER be a stay-at-home mom!”
I used to proudly proclaim this before having kids. Fast forward to now, and I find myself completely rethinking my stance.
Recently, my partner and I made the significant choice for me to leave my job after welcoming our second child, who’s due at the end of December. This wasn’t a spur-of-the-moment decision; it involved a lot of careful consideration and planning on how we could manage on a single income. Yes, I could take on some side gigs, but they were often unpredictable. We knew there would be sacrifices involved. For instance, we’ve been without cable for over a year, we’ve stopped buying each other lavish gifts, and dining out has become a rare treat. Most of our purchases are second-hand, and we’ve become quite savvy with our budget. Surprisingly, these sacrifices don’t feel like hardships at all; they feel like necessary adjustments that have brought our family closer.
After I returned to work following my first child’s birth, everyone assured me it would get easier. But for me, the anxiety about leaving him and the sadness of missing his milestones never faded. As he grew more interactive, I longed to be at home even more. On my days off, it was clear that our family thrived when we were together. No matter how chaotic a day could be with a little one—whether it was messes, tantrums, or nap refusals—I would choose the toughest day at home over the best day at the office. Those joyful moments of reading, playing, and teaching him were irreplaceable. While I understand the need for some parents to have adult time away, I personally found fulfillment in being present with my child.
It’s a bit ironic, considering I spent years earning a master’s degree and always found my career in healthcare rewarding. Helping my patients as a speech pathologist was fulfilling, yet it paled in comparison to the precious time I missed with my child during those long workdays.
Now, I feel incredibly fortunate to have the chance to spend more time at home with my children, a privilege made possible by my partner’s unwavering support. I’ve come to understand what truly works for me, and I’m grateful for that realization.
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In summary, my journey from a career-focused mindset to embracing stay-at-home motherhood was unexpected yet fulfilling. The joy of being present for my children’s growth has far outweighed any sacrifices we’ve made along the way.
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