Updated: August 21, 2023
Originally Published: April 28, 2014
Did you believe your days of casual encounters were over after settling down with your partner? What follows is a humorous yet truthful look at what it’s like to reach a deeper level of friendship with your mom friend—where the stakes are real, and the scenarios are often far from glamorous.
The Threshold of True Camaraderie
So, you’ve crossed the threshold of true camaraderie. It’s about to get intense. This phase, akin to reaching third base, is not meant for those who maintain a facade of having everything under control. Even if you can hold it together for a short while, your children will inevitably reveal the truth long before you can say, “Welcome to my home.” In this stage, your kids will showcase their true colors, and your friend will witness firsthand how you manage—or struggle with—parenting.
A Humorous “Mom Date” Experience
If that thought doesn’t send a jolt of anxiety through you, let me share a recent experience I had during a “mom date.” Initially, everything seemed to be going smoothly. Then, chaos struck.
My friend’s toddler decided it was the perfect moment to have a bowel movement in the upstairs bathroom, using up an entire roll of toilet paper in the process. As she exited without washing her hands, I stepped inside to find a toilet rapidly filling with a rather unpleasant mess. Faced with the scene, I made the decision that any exemplary hostess would: I quickly exited, pretending not to notice the disaster unfolding.
Meanwhile, my own child was creating her own brand of havoc downstairs. As I entered the bathroom, the overwhelming odor hit me like a freight train. My daughter, already on the toilet, apologized for the mess she had made. As I assured her that using the potty is a normal part of childhood, I was met with the sight of her having transformed the bathroom into a disaster zone, with feces smeared everywhere—on the walls, the toilet seat, and her clothes. All I could muster was a strained, “How on earth?!”
While she washed her hands, I frantically disposed of her soiled outfit, unable to think of anything other than the possibility of my friend discovering the chaos. I tackled the mess in the bathroom, cleaned the toilet, and whisked my daughter off for an urgent bath. After a change of clothes and multiple rounds of hand washing, I returned to the couch as if nothing had happened, discussing our daily lives with my friend, who was blissfully unaware of the toilet mayhem.
Later, my husband emerged from the bathroom, having heroically dealt with the clogged toilet, providing a semblance of normalcy for our guest—until now, perhaps, as she reads this. After my friend and her crew departed, another friend arrived, and I found myself in yet another round of chaos. When she returned from the bathroom, she informed me that she had almost sat in feces herself, due to my child’s earlier accident. I can assure you that at this point, embarrassment was a futile endeavor.
The following day, I discovered that our banister was also marked by the remnants of our previous adventures, further illustrating that reaching this level of friendship with fellow moms means navigating through some truly messy experiences.
The Raw and Real Journey of Motherhood
While not every encounter will involve such extreme scenarios, this phase of friendship is undeniably raw and real. It’s a reminder that the journey of motherhood is filled with unexpected challenges, laughter, and a whole lot of mess.
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Summary
Navigating the often chaotic world of friendships with fellow moms can lead to unexpected, hilarious, and sometimes messy situations. Embracing the realities of these relationships involves understanding that parenting is not always picture-perfect, but rather filled with genuine moments of connection and laughter.
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