After spending countless hours sharing experiences with fellow stay-at-home parents (SAHPs) at the playground, I’ve realized that our challenges are often universal. This list serves as a guide for our partners, aiming to foster a happier home environment. Because a content SAHP usually translates to a harmonious family life. So, partners, please steer clear of the following inquiries:
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“Wow, it’s a bit cluttered in here.”
Really? I’ve tidied up this space multiple times already. Those toy trains have been in and out of baskets, and I’ve spent a good chunk of my precious nap time cleaning. If you’re so concerned about the mess, why not grab a cloth and help out while entertaining the kids? I’m going to need a moment to relax. -
“What exactly did you do all day?”
If a fellow SAHP asks, I might jokingly say “nothing.” But when you ask, it feels like you’re implying I’m just lounging around. How can I possibly articulate a day filled with endless rounds of imaginative play? Sure, it’s amusing that the kids seem glued to their screens when you’re around, but they’re fully engaged with me. -
“You seem to be raising your voice a lot.”
Oh, really? Try herding a group of children and repeatedly asking them to put on their shoes while managing unexpected accidents. After a day filled with this chaos, it’s no surprise my patience wears thin by evening. -
“I just need a few minutes to unwind when I get home.”
It’s great that you want some time for yourself, but until the kids are asleep, that quiet time doesn’t exist. Why not take a moment for yourself on your way home instead? -
“Didn’t you pick up those _______ today?”
(Insert item: cleaning supplies, snacks, etc.) Really? You could have grabbed that on your way home from work! Please don’t follow that with “What did you do all day?” It’s not like I could easily take the kids shopping for those items. -
“You should just get a babysitter for some time off.”
Absolutely, a break would be lovely. But I don’t need a babysitter; I need you to manage your schedule better so I don’t lose my cool when you’re late. -
“When did you last have a shower?”
Let’s just not go there. -
“You should try to make it a game.”
Oh, sure, because a toddler’s tantrum will magically disappear if I turn it into a game. By the end of the day, I’m just trying to survive until bedtime, and I’d rather not play any games to get them to cooperate. -
“Isn’t it time for a haircut?”
Funny how I can’t find time to even look in the mirror. If you think I need one, why not schedule it for me along with a babysitter?
Feel free to add your own thoughts on what keeps SAHPs happy. I’ve got to dash; my little one just discovered a box of matches.
This article was originally published on June 26, 2014.
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Summary:
In this article, we discuss nine questions that stay-at-home parents would prefer their partners avoid. The inquiries range from commenting on household messiness to questioning their daily activities or suggesting breaks. Acknowledging the unique challenges faced, it’s important for partners to offer support rather than criticism to maintain a happy family environment.
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