During my twenties, I was quite the champion of couch lounging. Late mornings? Absolutely. Breakfast often consisted of four chocolate pastries. My evening routine revolved around binge-watching sitcoms, all while snacking on chips. I wasn’t particularly discontented with my body or my fitness; my jeans always fit the “plus size” label, and I found myself panting after a simple two-flight stair climb.
At 25, I married a man deeply invested in fitness. He adored me in my couch-potato state since we met at 18, and I felt no need to change, especially since he seemed perfectly fine with my extra weight.
Fast forward to 28, when I welcomed my first daughter. The couch potato lifestyle seemed perfectly suited for a new mom. By 31, I had another daughter, and nine months later, I tackled my first half marathon.
The initial stages of training were challenging; I loathed every mile. I did it primarily for myself, as I was holding onto a few extra pounds from my pregnancies, but more importantly, I wanted to keep up with my daughters. My oldest was three, full of energy, while my youngest was a spirited baby. I aspired to be a role model for them—a strong, confident woman. On race day, as I struggled at mile ten, it was their encouraging smiles on the sidelines that propelled me forward.
In my conversations with my daughters, we focus on being “strong” and “healthy.” Terms like “skinny” or “losing weight” are absent from our discussions, as the world will soon bombard them with those messages.
When I turned 33, a surprise baby boy joined our family. With a five-year-old, a two-year-old, and a newborn, life became hectic. My husband had just launched a new business, and I was dealing with debilitating postpartum anxiety. It would have been easy to let running fall to the wayside; I had already shown my daughters the importance of strength. But I realized I needed to set an example for my son as well.
I want him to grow into a man who values women for their capabilities, not their appearance. I envision him encouraging his future partner to embrace adventure, whether it’s rock climbing or biking. As a father, I want him to inspire his daughters in sports just as much as his sons.
Many mothers recognize the importance of being role models for their daughters, but we must also consider our sons. Their perceptions of relationships and healthy behaviors will be deeply influenced by how we present ourselves. I want all my children to understand the significance of health and self-confidence while also appreciating the occasional indulgence—like savoring a fourth chocolate pastry.
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In summary, my journey to self-care has transformed not only my life but also how I aim to influence my children’s understanding of health, strength, and self-esteem.
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