It’s important to discuss a sensitive topic: my child, who is living with HIV, interacts with your child regularly, and you may not even be aware of it. She has played alongside your child at a local preschool, shared a laugh during swim lessons, and stood in line at gymnastics class. Due to legal protections regarding her health status, we are not obligated to disclose her HIV-positive status to schools, camps, or even other parents—only to healthcare professionals.
The stigma surrounding HIV has led to significant advocacy, enabling individuals to maintain privacy regarding their health. Our adoption counselor advised us, “Share this information with no one. There’s enough misunderstanding and bias already. Your child’s background is unique, and additional stigma could complicate matters further.”
A Child’s Perspective
At kindergarten this year, my daughter, Lily, attempted to share her truth with your child. “Mia, guess what? I have a dragon in my blood. I was born with it, and my birth mother had it too. When I take my medicine, the dragon goes to sleep.” Unfortunately, Mia and her friends found it hard to comprehend, with one child even exclaiming, “I was born in China, and I have a dragon too!” It’s a reminder that children often lack the context to understand complex issues like health.
Understanding HIV Transmission
There’s a reason we don’t have to inform daycare providers, schools, or community organizations about her status: HIV cannot be transmitted in these everyday environments. Thanks to modern medications, the virus is rendered inactive. Each blood test reveals that no virus is detectable in her system, and she continues to thrive—full of energy and joy. I care for her as I would any child: bandaging her scrapes, sharing snacks, and comforting her during colds—without any risk of HIV transmission.
The Importance of Awareness
It’s crucial to note that Lily’s condition is a result of her circumstances at birth. Had her birth mother been able to access effective antiretroviral therapy during pregnancy, she may not have been born with HIV. In China, these medications are provided free of charge by the government, yet many with HIV avoid treatment due to the fear of social rejection and ostracism.
Encouraging Education and Understanding
As Lily grows, she may form friendships and even romantic relationships, potentially marrying and having children of her own one day. Fellow parents, it’s essential to recognize that there is no need for fear surrounding HIV. I encourage you to educate yourself on this topic—resources like Resolve and articles on home insemination can provide valuable insights. Additionally, if you’re interested in home insemination options, the Cryobaby kit offers effective solutions.
Conclusion
In summary, my HIV-positive child is playing alongside your child, and it’s vital to understand that this is perfectly safe. Ignorance and stigma are far more dangerous than the virus itself.
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