The holiday season often evokes mixed feelings, and it’s not uncommon for individuals to express their dissatisfaction with the festivities. After years of personal experience marked by consistent letdowns, I’ve discovered a fundamental truth: the key to truly enjoying this time of year mirrors the essence of finding joy in life itself. Here are two essential principles to keep in mind:
- Lower your expectations.
- Only engage in activities that genuinely align with your desires, aside from obligatory responsibilities like paying taxes or adhering to traffic laws.
Many people I encounter voice their dislike for returning home during the holidays. They share grievances about family dynamics—overindulgent parenting, difficult relatives, and awkward interactions. While I’m fortunate not to face these specific issues, I still find little joy in the holiday commute to my childhood home. I prefer visiting my parents during pleasant weather when outdoor activities are possible. I don’t relish the idea of observing my nieces glued to their phones, texting friends about their new gifts. Instead of feeling nostalgic, it often leaves me feeling outdated and irritable—so why put myself through that?
Regarding gift-giving, the financial strain can be overwhelming. The simplest solution? Don’t feel obligated to purchase gifts for everyone. Instead, consider giving a single thoughtful present to one person. For instance, I recently picked up some books for a friend—not someone I’m exceptionally close to, but I knew she would appreciate them. This one gesture allowed me to feel accomplished in my holiday shopping.
Of course, children are a different story, as they are typically more aware of the concept of gifts and often expect them. However, as they grow older and begin to understand the value of money, it’s worthwhile to have honest conversations with them about spending and materialism. After all, we often bombard them with the notion of pursuing higher education and jobs, perpetuating a cycle of financial struggle. A small dose of realism can be refreshing for them.
This approach extends to holiday parties as well. I personally find office celebrations to be unenjoyable, so I’ve opted out of attending mine this year—no excuses necessary!
As for my holiday plans, they are refreshingly uncomplicated. I envision a peaceful day spent savoring bourbon and rewatching my favorite film, “The Ghost Writer.” While I encourage lowering expectations, I understand that many might interpret my plans as delightful.
In essence, taking a break during the holidays when it’s culturally acceptable to relax indoors and catch up on television shows is a blessing. If you’re struggling to shift your perspective on the holidays from something burdensome to something you might enjoy, try repeating the phrase aloud: “The holidays. The holidays. The holidays.” It’s a simple, non-threatening concept—much like supermarket eggnog, which, let’s face it, can still be enjoyable.
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Summary
The holidays can be enjoyable if we adjust our expectations and prioritize our true desires. By simplifying gift-giving and choosing not to engage in unwelcome traditions, we can create a more satisfying experience.

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