The internet’s fixation on body size often overshadows the genuine concern for health. My personal journey began at the tender age of 13 when I discovered that I could restrict my food intake without raising any alarms, particularly from my weight-conscious mother. I was determined to avoid the scrutiny my sister faced as a teenager, who was often criticized for her weight. My aim was to evade the challenges of adolescence while hiding from the reality of my Greek-Italian heritage and the curvy body that came with it.
For most of my life, I’ve battled with eating disorders, which have distorted my understanding of food and exercise. Social media amplifies this distorted reality, normalizing public displays of diet and fitness while shaming those who struggle with their weight. At what point did society decide it was acceptable to celebrate extreme diets while condemning individuals simply trying to navigate their existence in larger bodies?
Comments like “Loving your body is fine, but glorifying obesity isn’t” echo the sentiments of many who believe that size should dictate one’s health. However, when fitness enthusiasts share their runs or juice cleanses, the response is overwhelmingly positive. But as soon as someone gains weight, the internet becomes a breeding ground for unsolicited health advice.
When I was slimmer, no one questioned my health, even when I was regularly fainting due to severe undernourishment. My friends and family made light of my condition instead of addressing the underlying issues. This behavior underscores a troubling reality: our society tends to laugh off serious health concerns when they are cloaked in a socially acceptable body type.
I recently penned an essay lamenting the difficulties of finding clothing in sizes 14-16, a reflection of the average American woman’s size. While many women resonated with my frustrations, I also faced a barrage of body shaming. Instead of focusing on the clothing industry’s shortcomings, the comments often turned to my health and size, revealing a discomfort with my body positivity.
After years of struggling with weight and body image, I’ve shifted my focus from the scale to my overall well-being. It’s been four years since I engaged in harmful behaviors, and during that time, I gained 45 pounds. This weight gain hasn’t stemmed from a sedentary lifestyle filled with indulgence; I’ve navigated the challenges of motherhood, career changes, and other stressors. I refused to revert to self-destructive habits that once defined me.
Despite occasional moments of self-doubt when I glance in the mirror, I’ve embraced my body at its heaviest. After extensive medical evaluations, I was relieved to learn that I am in excellent health. This journey has taught me that health cannot be measured solely by weight, and I am finally at peace with my appearance—unapologetically living in my body.
In conclusion, while there have been unhealthy habits during my weight gain, I now focus on nourishing my body and enjoying life. I take walks to appreciate the beauty around me and eat foods that make me feel good, not as a means to an end. I refuse to live in shame or allow others to dictate how I should feel about my body. And I certainly won’t shy away from demanding clothes that fit my size 16 frame.
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In summary, I am thriving, healthy, and unapologetic about my body, and that’s a narrative worth sharing.
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