Dear Single Mom,
As Mother’s Day approaches, I’ve been reflecting on your journey. For many, this day can evoke a mix of emotions, and I understand that deeply. I was a single mother for nearly five years, and I’ve witnessed the struggles of others like you, including my sister, who faced similar challenges for seven years, and my mother, who has navigated single parenthood for most of her life.
Mother’s Day can feel awkward for you. Without a partner, the typical gestures of appreciation—like breakfast in bed, encouraging your children to let you rest, or receiving thoughtful gifts—might seem out of reach. It’s simply not fair, as you deserve every bit of recognition and pampering that any mother receives.
You might also experience a sense of guilt for your child on this day, wishing they had someone to help create the perfect gift for you. There’s a nagging worry that your sons may not know how to care for their future partners, or that your daughters might struggle with accepting love from their husbands. It’s painful to feel such sadness and guilt on a day meant to honor you.
Perhaps you find yourself wrestling with feelings of anger, isolation, or inadequacy. Even if you have a supportive network, you may still feel like the weight of parenting rests solely on your shoulders. After the gatherings and celebrations, when you return home, it’s still just you managing everything.
Or, like my mother, you may have spent several Mother’s Days with young children who weren’t yet able to contribute in meaningful ways. Each year, it may feel like just another day passing by.
To all the single mothers out there, I want to share an important truth about Mother’s Day. The toughest aspect of being a single mom for me was the overwhelming weight of responsibility. Everything fell on me—providing, nurturing, teaching, and disciplining. It often felt like there was no refuge, no place to simply be.
But this Mother’s Day, I want to remind you that you are not alone. Even if you feel like you have no support, even if you’ve been navigating this journey alone since your child was born, and even if the father of your children has chosen to be absent, remember that you are not alone.
This year, I hope you find moments of rest. I hope you receive a heartfelt card or a handmade craft from your child. I hope those who care about you take the time to show their appreciation. I hope your children wrap their arms around you, offering extra hugs and smiles. Consider treating yourself to a movie or a manicure, and don’t hesitate to bring your kids along; after all, it’s your day. If nothing else, prepare your favorite meals (and steer clear of the chicken fingers) and bake a cake that they can decorate—just be cautious with the sprinkles!
And even if the day doesn’t unfold as you hope, I want you to internalize this message: You are a remarkable mother. You hold a unique and invaluable role in your child’s life. You’ve got this, and you will continue to do this.
Happy Mother’s Day to you.
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