Let’s be real; if my husband, Jake, reads this title, he might do a double take. “Wait, is this really true?” he might think. But, dear Jake, I promise I do aim to put you first, even if it doesn’t always seem that way.
It’s impossible to rank my love for the people in my life. My parents hold a special place in my heart for all the sacrifices they’ve made for me. My sister, Lily, has been a huge part of my life since day one, and of course, there’s my husband, the one I chose to share my life with. Then there are our kids, the delightful blessings I wanted and received through divine timing. I love them all equally, no questions asked.
However, life is about making choices. We can’t do everything, and we certainly can’t have it all. That’s why I embrace the philosophy of prioritizing my husband before my kids.
Many people who know me, including Jake, might think my love for our kids surpasses my love for him. But in reality, I believe they all deserve love, and my intention is to always uplift my husband first.
If you’re reading this, kiddos, I hope you’ll come to understand my perspective as you grow. Each one of you means the world to me, and here’s why I hold this belief:
1. We Chose Each Other
Out of everyone in my life, Jake is the person I specifically chose to love and be with. He deserves more than just secondary status once the kids arrive. I need to continually show him that he remains my first choice and to never take him for granted.
2. No One Else Will Prioritize Us
If we don’t prioritize each other, who will? We made a lifelong commitment to be there for each other. Jake is naturally the type to put others ahead of himself, which I admire, but I want to make sure he feels valued and prioritized too.
3. We’re the Foundation for Our Children
My goal in life is to build a happy family, and that happiness starts with Jake and me. If I put the kids first, Jake might feel overlooked, which can strain our marriage. A strong partnership makes for a stronger family unit. We need to model this dynamic for our children, so they grow up understanding that a healthy relationship is crucial.
4. We Don’t Raise Self-Centered Kids
We are the first generation of parents who focus on our children’s needs above all else. But it’s essential for our kids to understand that everyone has their place in life. They should know that sometimes, they won’t be the focal point, and that’s okay.
5. Our Kids Will Learn the Importance of Marriage
As they witness our relationship, they’ll understand what a healthy marriage looks like. We want them to value their future partners, knowing that keeping the relationship strong is essential, even when kids come into the picture.
6. Eventually, It Will Just Be Us
Once the kids grow up and start their own lives, it will just be Jake and me again. I want to keep our bond strong now so that we don’t find ourselves distant when that time comes.
Putting Jake first doesn’t mean neglecting the kids. It simply means that in our family decisions, I consider Jake’s feelings alongside those of our children.
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In summary, prioritizing my husband doesn’t mean my kids are less loved. It’s a balanced approach that strengthens our family bond while teaching our children valuable lessons about love and relationships.
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