Preschoolers Shouldn’t Be Expected to ‘Sit Still’

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You know, preschool feels like this crazy bridge between my kids being with me all day and then suddenly spending hours in a classroom. That transition hasn’t been easy. We signed our son, Jake, up for preschool mainly to help him socialize and get used to a classroom setting. We thought that if he learned the rules, he’d follow them. Some days he nails it; other days, not so much.

I’ve learned a lot through this process, and honestly, I’ve come to terms with the fact that I don’t really care whether Jake “sits still” in class. I know, I know, that might sound a bit radical! I used to worry about it a lot, especially after those awkward parent-teacher chats. While other kids seemed to breeze through circle time without a fuss, Jake struggled. But then I thought, “Wait, he’s only in preschool!”

Sitting still for any length of time is tough for little ones, especially when they’re around 4 to 5 years old. I compare it to having an itch you can’t scratch. If I can’t scratch it, that itch becomes all-consuming. So, I’ve been working with Jake’s teacher to find ways he can fidget without disrupting the class.

This whole journey has opened my eyes to how common this issue really is. There are even products designed to help kids fidget while they learn! Research shows that allowing kids to fidget can actually improve their focus. Schools are beginning to modify chairs for sensory feedback, and some use yoga balls instead of traditional seating. There are even rubber bands on desk legs for kids to bounce their feet! Standing desks are becoming more popular, too.

In Jake’s class, some kids can sit still without a problem while others, like him, benefit from a little movement. Each child is unique, and their learning styles can vary just as much. We can’t overlook the needs of kids who are naturally more energetic.

Now, I’m not suggesting we let kids run wild with roller skates and kazoos during lessons. We have boundaries. Wiggling is one thing; invading personal space is another. Jake understands this well. When his teacher gives him instructions, I expect him to follow them. We talk about the importance of his friends learning too and how being respectful is key. He’s just a mover and a shaker, and that’s okay!

When I pick him up from preschool now, I still chat with his teacher. I ask about what’s working for him and empathize with her on tough days. She gets it, too! My frustration has faded because I no longer feel embarrassed about Jake simply being a 4-year-old. We’ve set realistic expectations and have made adjustments so he can thrive without being punished for his natural behavior. He’s happier, enjoys school more, and transitions smoother, which makes this mom much happier too!

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In summary, preschoolers shouldn’t be expected to sit still. Understanding their need to move is crucial for their learning. By collaborating with teachers and acknowledging each child’s unique needs, we can create supportive environments that help them thrive.


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