You know, I can’t quite pinpoint when it all shifted, but it did—almost sneaking up on me without any warning. It wasn’t a sudden change, but a gradual evolution. Sometimes, when I see you, I can still catch a glimpse of that little boy with those bright eyes and a chocolate-smeared smile, and it takes me by surprise to hear the deeper voice of the almost-man you’ve become. Who is this person? Where did my little boy go?
These moments are becoming less frequent, though, because you’ve been growing up and moving away from me for quite a while now. Since the day you were born, really. The changes were so small that I hardly noticed them until bam! It hit me: my little boy is transforming into a young man. Of course, this is a natural part of life, but that doesn’t make it any easier.
With this transition comes a newfound confidence, and maybe a bit of cockiness too. But just know, it’s perfectly okay to feel lost sometimes. We’re all just navigating this journey together. Honestly, I’ve been around for decades, and there are still days when I feel like a frightened kid or an awkward teen. It’s alright; don’t hesitate to ask for help and trust your instincts—you’ll figure it out.
Important Lessons
There are some important lessons I hope you’ve picked up along the way…
Your dad and I want you to understand that the phrase “being a man” doesn’t really hold any weight. Just ignore it. The same goes for “man up.” It’s also completely fine to shed tears and apologize when necessary. You can be strong while also being sensitive; bravery and kindness can coexist beautifully.
Always hold doors open for everyone—not just women, but for men too. Let others step onto the elevator first. This isn’t about some outdated idea of chivalry; it’s about being polite and kind. Remember those good manners when you push in your chair, put the toilet seat down, and for goodness’ sake, toss your socks into the laundry basket.
Make it a point to leave every place better than you found it.
When you find someone special, skip the games. Be straightforward and genuine. Let them see the real you, even if it involves risking a broken heart.
About sex—this shouldn’t even need saying since we’ve chatted about it so many times—no means no. Silence means no. Even a maybe is a no. Only a yes is a yes. (And stop rolling your eyes at me; yes, mom is discussing sex.)
The world is filled with some pretty awful people, but there are also so many incredible individuals. Just not being a jerk isn’t enough. You need to be brave and kind enough to stand up to the jerks too. Advocate for yourself and others, even if the cause doesn’t directly affect you. It’s crucial to speak out because silence only helps the bad guys.
Surround yourself with people who encourage you to be the best version of yourself.
Don’t buy into the myth that men can’t do grocery shopping, make the bed, or care for a baby; it’s simply not true. You’re smart and capable—step up and take care of things around the house.
Be proud of who you are, but never take for granted the privileges that come from your gender, education, race, culture, or socioeconomic status. Use your privilege to uplift those who lack the same advantages. Remember: “There but for the grace of God, go we all.”
Your brother is your lifelong buddy, and you’re both on the same team. Even if you annoy each other sometimes, you’re two sides of the same coin. Who else will understand when you vent about your crazy parents?
And when all else fails, sprinkle some magic into the world. Lift others up and strive to make it a better place.
Love,
Mom
P.S. Don’t forget to call your parents!
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