Hey there,
You’re about to get some news that you’ve been dreading deep down. That ultrasound with the soft markers for Down syndrome has led to the call you feared; it’s going to hit you hard, especially in that cold, empty space of your new rental home.
As you sit there, tears streaming down your face, you’ll find yourself recalling all those negative thoughts you’ve ever had about Down syndrome. You’ll remember that little girl who was scared of the teenage boy in the hotel pool, those college days when someone joked you looked like you had “downs,” and the conversations with your mother-in-law where you insisted you could never handle a child with special needs.
But guess what? Now you’re here. It may feel like your world is crumbling, but that little one inside you is actually piecing things together in a way you can’t see yet. Your insecurities and fears? They’re about to be challenged and transformed.
When you meet the doctor, he might tell you that your son’s greatest ambition will be to mop floors at a fast-food joint. You’ll believe him for a bit, and it’s going to feel like a heavy loss. Nights will be spent crying in the shower, and mornings will prove even tougher as the reality sets in. But then, something within you will awaken. You might not be able to put your journalism skills to use in this small town, but you can definitely use them to document your journey.
You’ll discover a world of possibilities like school inclusion and college programs for young adults with Down syndrome. You’ll connect with a mom who introduces you to the Down Syndrome Diagnosis Network, an organization dedicated to improving the experience of those who receive this diagnosis.
I wish I could take away the hurt you’re feeling, but here’s the thing: I wouldn’t change it if I could. This pain is going to fuel new passions in you. You once told stories of others, but now you have your own incredible narrative to share. It will resonate with thousands, and your words will become a source of encouragement for many. This journey will lead you to advocacy, volunteering, and writing, allowing you to make a meaningful impact for families touched by Down syndrome.
You need to know that your son is uniquely him because of that extra chromosome. And you? You’re going to become who you were always meant to be through this experience.
Most of those worries you’re having—about your daughter, traveling again, or doing this without family support—are unfounded. Sure, it won’t be easy. Life will become busier with appointments, and you’ll be stretched thin, but this busyness will be for your son’s benefit and will help you grow even more.
On New Year’s Eve, you’ll welcome that sweet little boy with almond-shaped eyes. He’ll look at you, and in that moment, both of your lives will change forever. It’s not the end; it’s a beautiful new beginning.
Love,
You — three years later
Leave a Reply