“Mom, can I bake something?” my eight-year-old daughter, Emma, asked eagerly as she strolled into the kitchen. Of course, she wanted to bake. After spending two hours whipping up a multi-course meal for our family of five, I felt the exhaustion of cleanup weigh heavily. I sighed, “Not right now, sweetie. I just cleaned up, and it’ll make a mess.”
Predictably, she wandered off, likely to watch another mind-numbing episode on the Disney Channel. Reflecting on this moment, I can’t help but feel a pang of embarrassment—how many times had I turned her down? Don’t get me wrong; I often let Emma help in the kitchen. I’m a decent cook and love baking, but I limited her to simple tasks like gathering ingredients and mixing. Cracking eggs? Nope, too messy. Washing bowls? Not thorough enough. I even told her, “I don’t need help right now, but you can be the taste tester when it’s done.”
Then came that fateful evening when everything changed. I found Emma glued to the TV, watching “Chopped Junior.” I sank into the couch beside her and was instantly captivated. For the next 20 minutes, I watched kids her age navigate the kitchen with impressive skill—chopping, sautéing, and even making a roux (what even is a roux?!). My mind raced with one thought: these kids could do all of this because someone somewhere had told them, “YES.”
That night, I made a pact with myself: from then on, whenever Emma asked to help in the kitchen, I would say yes. “Mom, can I bake cookies?” Yes! “Mom, can I make scrambled eggs?” Yes! “Mom, can I whip up a quesadilla?” Yes! “Mom, can I create my own recipe?” Ugh, yes.
It was a messy, time-consuming adventure. At first, Emma needed lots of guidance—learning to handle the oven and gas range while my countertops were perpetually sticky. The sink was always full of bowls and pots. But the more I said yes, the more she wanted to cook. Soon, she was searching for recipes online and following them independently. My role shifted from teacher to observer as her skills and confidence blossomed.
Fast forward a year, and I can confidently say this was one of the best parenting decisions I have ever made. Emma, now able to whip up breakfast, lunch, dinner, and dessert, can even crack an egg with one hand (I still can’t do that!). Her homemade chocolate cupcakes are the best I’ve ever tasted. The confidence she’s gained will stick with her for life, and honestly, that makes every spilled egg and messy kitchen worth it.
So, fellow parents, I encourage you to think twice before saying no when your child asks to try something new—be it in the kitchen or any other area that fosters skills. The effort you invest upfront can lead to incredible payoffs down the road. Just for context, tomorrow I need to bring 24 cupcakes to a potluck, and guess what? Emma’s got it covered. If I’m lucky, she might even let me be her taste tester.
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In summary, embracing a “yes” mentality in parenting has transformed my daughter’s kitchen skills and confidence, leading to a rewarding experience for both of us.
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