Let’s get straight to the point, friends: it’s time to stop giving older folks a free pass for their problematic behavior. Sure, we all adore our grandparents and distant relatives, but that doesn’t mean we should overlook their outdated views and inappropriate comments. Love shouldn’t mean ignoring the fact that Grandma Edna insists on loudly making racist remarks in public. Enough is enough! It’s time we confront Aunt Mabel’s cringe-worthy comments about “those people” with a firm, “No more, Aunt Mabel. If it’s not nice or kind, maybe you should just enjoy those Werther’s Originals in silence.”
Uncomfortable Conversations
And speaking of uncomfortable conversations, how about a little chat with Uncle Bob about victim-blaming? A simple “We don’t blame women for the actions of others” would go a long way. It’s time to break out the tea and lay down the law, because in 2017, there’s no room for that kind of thinking.
Just because older generations grew up in a different era doesn’t mean they get a free pass on decency. We’ve been saying “they come from a different time” for too long. They’ve learned how to stream their favorite shows, so there’s no excuse for not keeping up with basic social decency. The past is the past, and it’s time for them to step up and adapt. It’s actually ageist to assume that just because someone is older, they can’t act with kindness and respect.
Bigotry Has No Justification
Let’s be clear: bigotry has no justification. Don’t let your family members slide just because their time is running out. Medical advancements mean Grandma Edna could be around for another decade, still spewing her outdated views about Adam and Steve. Help your future self and society by calling her out now.
Silence only enables the behavior. If Uncle Bob keeps making inflammatory comments about Sharia Law, it’s probably because he feels safe in your silence. Don’t just cough and change the subject at the dinner table—look him in the eye and say, “That’s not okay, Uncle Bob. Your fears are unfounded and damaging to peaceful Muslims in our community.”
Making Uncomfortable Conversations Normal
Making someone uncomfortable isn’t the end of the world. You’re not going to send Grandpa to an early grave by asking him to stop talking about “the blacks.” If your mom is more concerned about your call-out than about Grandpa’s racist rants, that’s an issue she needs to address.
Tip-toeing around these conversations does no one any favors. One consequence of bigotry is that decent people want to distance themselves. If Grandpa wants to see his grandkids more often than just on holidays, he might want to reconsider his words.
Ignoring hatred is a privilege. If we want a fair society, we need to start at home. Everyone, including Grandpa and Aunt Mabel, needs to feel the discomfort of hate. Remember, even the elders we admire lived through the Civil Rights Movement and were capable of critical thought. Let’s hold them accountable to those standards.
A Call to Action
As Martin Luther King Jr. once said, “I have almost reached the regrettable conclusion that the Negro’s great stumbling block in the stride toward freedom is not the White Citizen’s Council-er or the Ku Klux Klanner, but the white moderate who is more devoted to ‘order’ than to justice.” Absolutely, amen.
In Summary
In summary, it’s crucial to challenge outdated and harmful opinions within our families. Love does not mean acceptance of bigotry. Speak up and create a culture of respect, so future generations can thrive. For those interested in family planning, check out resources like Make a Mom for at-home insemination options and join our Facebook group for support.
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