I know I’ve expressed this sentiment before, but it’s worth reiterating as I navigate this new chapter: my daughter has officially entered adulthood, and it’s an experience that’s leaving me feeling a mix of pride and confusion.
I remember those early years—the toddler phase when she cut her hair no matter how well I hid the scissors, the tween years when she insisted on wearing shorts even in the harshest winter weather, and the teenage years filled with eye-rolling and drama that could rival any horror film. And now, here we are, at the “OMG, I have an adult child!” phase.
I’m sorry. Right now, in this moment, I am genuinely sorry. Sorry for every snarky, know-it-all comment I made about adulthood, as if I had it all figured out after just a few minutes of independence. I realize now how my words must have felt when I used that annoyingly cheerful tone that all moms seem to use.
What is Happening?
I cried when I left her at college, watching her walk away without looking back. I accepted it as part of life, knowing I love her dearly. But now she seems so busy that she misses my calls. I get it; she’s finding her wings, but really?
Her phone usage puts both her dad and me to shame, yet somehow she didn’t see my call yesterday? I was simply trying to help her with a bill. Money! But she claims she didn’t notice my call while she was posting on social media—using the same phone!
Deep breath.
I don’t know how you managed to put up with me, Mom, but I’m thankful you did. I can almost hear you saying, “This too shall pass.” But when? Will I ever want her to move back in? The love is there, but it’s complicated right now. I’m considering printing a T-shirt that says “I love my daughter” just to remind myself daily.
I hope her roommate appreciates her because I’m suggesting they find a summer house together. I can already hear the judgment from the other moms out there—trust me, I see things clearly now, and it’s not always pretty.
I recall wanting to break free and thinking I was so grown up, driving away in the car you gifted me. Is every college student like this, or am I just seeing my own reflection? I anticipated some distance when she left, but I clearly underestimated the emotional toll. She’s not entirely ready to embrace adulthood, and neither are her father and I completely done parenting her.
We’re stuck in this strange limbo, uncertain of how to navigate this new dynamic. We’re bound to falter more than we succeed for a while.
Today, I might just ignore some texts from her and reach out to you a bit more, Mom.
With love,
Your Daughter
P.S. I truly appreciated that car—and the other one, too.
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In summary, parenting an adult child brings its own set of challenges, from navigating communication to managing expectations. As we all adjust to this new phase, the love remains strong, even when it feels complicated.
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