By: Janelle Thompson
Date: February 10, 2023
With the recent surge of #MeToo stories making headlines, I’ve found it increasingly difficult to remain silent about my own experiences. The culture of shame and embarrassment is fading, replaced by a sense of empowerment in sharing our stories. In that spirit, I want to share my experience and pose some questions to you. I used to imagine confronting you in a store, but you’ve moved away, and now, years later, I’m ready to speak out.
When I was in elementary school, I knew you as the older brother of a friend. At the time, you were a teenager while I was still a child. I often attended her elaborate birthday parties, including one memorable sleepover. After a night of games, we fell asleep on the pull-out couch.
I’m a deep sleeper, but early the next morning, you woke me up while everyone else was still asleep. You lured me into a back room, claiming to have a special birthday surprise for your sister. You said we were staging a secret birthday play, which required me to take off my clothes for a costume fitting. I remember my Princess Jasmine pajamas, a gift from Christmas, lying discarded on the floor.
You took a measuring tape and “measured” me in ways I didn’t comprehend at the time. Although it could have been worse, it was clear that your actions were far from innocent. After what felt like an eternity, you told me to dress and go back to sleep, leaving me confused and alone.
I returned to the couch, staring at the ceiling, waiting for everyone to wake up. When they did, the day unfolded as if nothing had happened. I tried to express my excitement about our secret play, but you suddenly acted as if nothing was amiss, as if you had forgotten.
Years later, while watching an episode of Friends, the truth hit me like a ton of bricks. An innocent joke about a tailor triggered a flood of memories. I had buried those thoughts deep, but they resurfaced with a vengeance. I had wanted to speak out but hesitated—what good would it do now? Would you face consequences?
I never told anyone until one night I confided in my husband, revealing the trauma I endured. You weren’t alone; you were one of five men who violated me during my childhood. I doubt he knows how to process all of it.
Now, I have questions for you:
- Why me? There were other girls at that party. Did I seem more vulnerable? Did you target me?
- Do you remember what you did? Do you block out your victims, or are those memories cherished?
- I have children now, and your actions have made me terrified for their safety. I can’t leave them with babysitters or even male family members without feeling anxious.
- You ruined one of my favorite childhood movies for me. I loved Aladdin, but now every viewing is tainted by memories of that night.
- I’m married now and wanted my daughter to have a special dress. I took the measurements myself, haunted by the memories of you. You turned a beautiful moment into a painful reminder of your abuse.
- I hate you. I don’t believe in forgiving those who hurt others. You’ve taken something from me that I can never reclaim.
It’s time for me to share my #MeToo story. Others need to know about you and individuals like you. They deserve to feel empowered and to know that they can overcome their past. I might not have the evidence to bring you to justice, but I have a voice, and I’m using it. These stories need to be told, and people like you must be held accountable.
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Summary
The author recounts a painful childhood experience with an abuser, expressing the need to share her story and confront the past. She addresses her abuser with pointed questions about their actions and reflects on how the trauma has impacted her life and relationships. In doing so, she emphasizes the importance of speaking out and supporting others who have faced similar abuses.
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