Last Monday, Lucas’s high school conducted an active shooter drill. The next day, I received a note indicating that Lucas struggled during the exercise. On Wednesday morning, I had an extensive conversation with his case manager, who explained the issues he faced and the adjustments they were beginning to implement. That same afternoon, 17 students lost their lives at a Florida high school.
Lucas manages well with tornado drills, but the active shooter drill was different. He remained in his seat, not because he was disobedient, but because it was PE time, not a moment to sit silently in a darkened room. He wanted to run and play basketball. Yet, he remained seated.
He screamed. His voice echoed through the classroom, loud enough for one of the vice principals to enter and attempt to soothe him, but by then, the moment had passed. He screamed.
Tears streamed down his face. He cried. He remained in his chair; silence was not an option for him.
I was reminded of one of the most heart-wrenching scenes from the final episode of M*A*S*H, “Goodbye, Farewell, and Amen.” In it, Hawkeye is in therapy, recalling a traumatic bus ride where soldiers were hunting for victims. A woman with a chicken on her lap had it quiet, and then it suddenly stopped clucking. The dialogue from that scene played in my head:
Hawkeye: “Something’s wrong with it. It stopped making noise. It just—just stopped. Sh—She killed it! She killed it!”
Sidney: “She killed the chicken?”
Hawkeye: “Oh my God! I didn’t want her to kill it. I just wanted it to be quiet! It was—It was a baby! She—She smothered her own baby!”
I couldn’t help but think of Lucas at school, struggling to maintain silence when the threat of violence looms. The school is taking steps to support him for the next drill, including modifying his schedule for better adaptability. They’re also providing a laptop with headphones for distraction while he remains hidden. All these measures are commendable.
But what if they fail? What if he stays in his seat again? What if he screams? What if it’s not just a drill? My mind spirals into thoughts I wish I could avoid.
Tomorrow is Monday. Lucas will return to high school.
This article is originally from Feb. 23, 2018.
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Summary:
This article reflects the intense emotional challenges faced by children during active shooter drills, particularly focusing on Lucas, a student who struggles with silence during these exercises. The narrative draws a poignant parallel to a scene from M*A*S*H, illustrating the deeper implications of fear and trauma in schools. Support measures are being implemented, yet there remains anxiety about their effectiveness.
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