In the wake of tragic school shootings, many parents of children with mental health issues are grappling with overwhelming fear and concern. This is a sentiment I can no longer keep to myself, nor will I ignore it to sidestep uncomfortable conversations with friends and family. My anxiety about these incidents has reached a boiling point, and I can’t pretend anymore that I’m not terrified that my child could one day become part of a heartbreaking statistic.
I am the mother of an 8-year-old son diagnosed with bipolar disorder. From the tender age of two, he has exhibited a fascination with firearms, despite our family not owning any guns. He sketches them, mimics shooting with his fingers, and has made alarming statements about wanting to harm us. There are moments when his rage turns inward, leading him to express suicidal thoughts. It’s not just firearms; even our kitchen knives were once targets of his outbursts until we concealed them.
His aggressive behavior is often linked to his manic and depressive episodes. When he is stable, he is the most affectionate child, so much so that many of our friends are unaware of the severity of his mental health challenges. Those who do know often attribute his struggles to our supposed “poor parenting” rather than recognizing the complexities of his condition.
He received his first diagnosis at age five after we stopped dismissing his symptoms as a phase. Since then, we have navigated an exhausting journey that includes numerous medications, multiple therapists, and a hospitalization that left him worse off than before. We are dedicated parents doing our best, but the mental health care system is frustratingly inadequate, even with good insurance.
The stigma surrounding mental health is pervasive and disheartening. When I share our story, I often encounter comments suggesting my son needs punishment or isolation, which does nothing to address his mental health needs. Despite these challenges, he is a bright and well-liked child at school, where he maintains composure throughout the day only to unravel at home.
Adopted at birth, my son aspires to become a genetic engineer after being inspired by a superhero movie. He once questioned, “If my genes are the cause of my anger issues, why can’t my body adjust?” His insightful reflection left him in tears, feeling isolated by his struggles. My husband reassured him by emphasizing that everyone has their own challenges.
In online support groups, many parents share similar fears about their children potentially accessing firearms. Interestingly, research shows that only a small fraction of mass shootings are committed by individuals with serious mental illness. According to the American Psychiatric Association, this statistic represents just one percent of all gun-related homicides annually.
The debate surrounding gun ownership is complex, and while I respect the right to bear arms, I find it perplexing. The original intent of gun ownership laws no longer aligns with the reality of modern firearms, which are far more lethal than the weapons of the past. Countries like the UK and Australia have successfully implemented strict gun control measures, significantly reducing their homicide rates.
To those who support the NRA and refuse to address the intertwined issues of gun violence and mental health, I urge you to consider the implications of your stance. As a parent, I am left with the chilling prospect of hoping and praying that my son never encounters a firearm. I hope this resonates with you as you make voting decisions. In the meantime, let’s amplify the voices of our youth who are demanding change.
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Summary:
This article highlights the fears and challenges faced by parents of children with mental health issues in the aftermath of school shootings. It discusses the stigma surrounding mental illness, the struggles of obtaining adequate care, and the debate on gun ownership. The narrative emphasizes the need for understanding and support for families dealing with these complex issues.
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