To the gentleman who looked down on the state of my chaotic vehicle:
I can bet you wouldn’t dream of letting your own car look or smell like mine! And I highly doubt you’d let your spouse turn a family car into a disaster zone. How dare I! Apparently, I’m as off-putting as my van for prioritizing the needs of the living beings I care for over the cleanliness of a mode of transport.
Well, newsflash, my judgmental friend! The reason my “mom-mobile” resembles a tornado zone is that no one else takes my kids in their car willingly. When they do ride with others, it’s only because I’ve sweetened the deal with bribes of cash or my undying affection. Oddly enough, when they’re with other people, they appear well-fed and content, thanks to me meeting their endless demands before we leave.
When they’re in my care, however, they’re often drained from school, snacking nervously about after-school activities, and overwhelmed from social interactions. And guess what happens next? They unleash chaos in the car!
They leave a disaster with whatever they can reach—food wrappers, markers, papers, hair ties, remnants of yesterday’s snacks, and even a band-aid. It’s a free-for-all of messiness, topped with a layer of boogers.
While you might see my messy van as a sign of lazy parenting, let me assure you that my dedication to my children is anything but lackluster. Driving them all over town, back and forth because they forgot their favorite toy or pen, is hardly lazy. Feeding them in the car isn’t an act of apathy; it’s a survival tactic—mine, not theirs.
I don’t ignore my car’s cleanliness because I’m indifferent. I face enough judgment from you and other parents during drop-off without needing to hear snide comments from the guys at the local car wash.
You say “shame on me”? I say “shame on you.” Shame on you for not stepping in more. Oh, wait—you’re busy with work? Then shame on you for criticizing how I choose to juggle my responsibilities. My vehicle’s condition is a reflection of my exhaustion and the chaos of my life, where everyone else seems to be losing it—literally and figuratively.
So, sorry to break it to you, but this is my reality: I’m a mom whose car mirrors the clutter in my mind. Next time you see my messy van, maybe think of it as “filled with love” instead.
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In summary, parenting is messy and chaotic, just like my van. It’s a sign of love and care for my children, not laziness. So the next time you see a messy car, remember it might just be a reflection of a busy life filled with love.
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