March 21st marks National Single Parent Day, and it has me reflecting on the incredible journey of single parenthood. If I could, I would love to wrap my arms around all the single parents out there, gift them a box of chocolates, and grant them a day off to do as they please. Since that’s not feasible, let me take a moment to share some thoughts with you:
As a fellow single parent, I understand your struggles. There are days when you question how you’ve come this far and wonder how you’ll keep moving forward. Yet, deep down, you know you will because that’s simply your nature. When you look at your children, your commitment to giving your all every single day shines through.
You may experience moments when your heart feels heavy, and you doubt you’ll ever find love again. You might think it’s best to focus solely on your kids, your career, and yourself, steering clear of new relationships. You might wrestle with guilt for even contemplating inviting someone new into your life when your energy should be devoted to your family.
I know there are days when you wish for an extra pair of hands to help with school activities, bedtime routines, and those sleepless nights spent caring for sick little ones. Juggling everything as a solo parent can feel overwhelming, and you might worry that others perceive you as slacking. The reality is, you’re working so hard just to stay afloat that it can feel almost unbearable at times.
I get it. The pain of not seeing your children for days is heart-wrenching. Holidays can feel like a devastating reminder of what you’ve lost. It’s tempting to wish for the past, even if it was a relationship that didn’t serve you well, just because it seems easier than the reality you’re facing.
But you refuse to go back because you value yourself too much, and that’s an empowering realization. You have moments of joy, too. There are days when you watch your kids and recognize that you are doing a fantastic job. Occasionally, guilt may creep in, making you ponder whether you could have done more. But then, there are times when you embrace your new normal, and nothing can bring you down—not a nasty message from an ex, a note from school, or even those jeans that feel a bit snug.
You fluctuate between feeling liberated and utterly defeated in mere minutes, and you miss the companionship of an adult at the dinner table. You’ve taken on both the roles of mother and father, which can be exhausting. Yet, there are moments when you relish the freedom to make decisions solely for yourself, whether it’s lounging in bed with snacks or controlling the thermostat without debate. You might even enjoy the simplicity of serving cold cereal for dinner while binge-watching your favorite shows.
It’s completely natural to feel a pang of sadness when you see families crossing the street together or couples holding hands, wishing for something similar. You don’t want to be cynical, but sometimes it’s hard not to be.
Your emotions run deeper now, and while there are times you appreciate this depth, there are others when it frustrates you. You long for the ease of rolling with the punches like you once did when you had a partner to lean on. But now, everything is different—you are different.
You are stronger and more vulnerable, happier and yet sometimes sadder. You embody both sides of the spectrum because you have no choice, and perhaps even more so, because you are incredibly resilient and adept at navigating life. This journey of single parenting can be exhausting, making you want to retreat some days, while other days, you’re eager to engage fully. Striking a balance feels impossible, and you might find yourself oscillating between keeping busy and wanting to isolate with your favorite treats.
But look at you! Recognize what you’ve achieved for yourself and your family. You are reinventing yourself, learning, and growing through the chaos. You are remarkable, and I see you. So, take some time—today, tomorrow, or even next week—to celebrate yourself. Remember to do this often. You deserve it. Yes, being a happy parent is one of the best gifts you can give to your children, but learning to care for yourself is a valuable gift for you, too. Just because you’re on this journey alone doesn’t mean you should neglect your own needs.
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Summary
This article pays tribute to single parents, acknowledging their struggles, resilience, and the unique journey of parenting alone. It encourages self-care and celebrates the strength that comes with navigating life as a single caregiver while emphasizing the importance of finding joy amidst the chaos.
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