I’ve got about five bikinis in my wardrobe—not because I believe I’m rocking the look, but because they offer more comfort than one-pieces. Those tend to ride up in all the wrong places and never provide the support I need. After a day at the beach, I often end up with a sore back and feeling irritable. Plus, slipping into a bikini makes it easier to wade into the ocean and adjust it as needed, letting the sand wash away after building sandcastles with my kids.
Back in my teenage years and even before I became a mom, you wouldn’t catch me in a bikini unless I was sunbathing in total seclusion. Sure, one-piece swimsuits hide more of my imperfections, but I’ve come to realize that this newfound self-assurance I’ve discovered in my 40s is one of the most unexpected and cherished gifts of this decade. Now, I buy a bikini whenever I find one I like—no fitting room drama required.
My younger self thought that turning 40 would have me scrambling for cosmetic procedures—getting everything lifted or filled, chasing after that elusive youthful appearance. But that’s not how this chapter of my life is unfolding. I’m not overly concerned about my appearance anymore, which is why I embrace my gray hair, fine lines, and the fact that my backside has sagged a couple of inches.
Isn’t it interesting how this maturity allows women to recognize and reject nonsense? We become adept at spotting the things that could derail us and stop them before they even get a chance. We prioritize our happiness over the opinions of others, having learned the hard way that sometimes, it’s just not worth compromising our values. This newfound strength means saying no to toxic relationships and uncomfortable situations, including swimsuits that cause irritation in sensitive areas.
Most of us have experienced fake friends, unfulfilling meals, and even faked pleasure enough to know that authenticity is far more rewarding. We’d rather embrace solitude than settle for anything less than genuine interactions, and that creates a certain inner glow. Ultimately, realizing the importance of self-respect is the new definition of attractive.
It’s amusing to think back to my childhood, when honoring myself was second nature. I laughed loudly, expressed my opinions freely, and didn’t hesitate to voice my discomfort. Somewhere along the way, I learned to quiet that voice, becoming overly concerned with my appearance and how I measured up against others. My self-worth became dependent on external validation, and I let that happen for far too long.
Women’s resilience can be worn down over time, but when we rediscover ourselves, it’s like finding a long-lost friend. And there’s no way I’m going back to a version of myself that shrinks to fit someone else’s mold. My friends and I often marvel at our increased confidence in our 40s, as we once feared this would be a time of decline. How wrong we were! The celebration is just beginning, and I’m thrilled I’ve kept just the right amount of confidence to enjoy my life in all its imperfect beauty.
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In summary, embracing confidence in my 40s has been liberating. I’ve learned to appreciate my body and prioritize my happiness over societal expectations. With newfound self-respect, I’m ready to take on this exciting phase of life.
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