It’s late, and after a marathon of getting my kids to sleep—only for them to jump out of bed a hundred times—I finally have a moment to breathe. Unfortunately, my mind is racing with anxiety. I can’t shake off the thoughts about the countless tasks I need to tackle, errands I’ve neglected, and ways I feel like I’m falling short.
I aspire to be an amazing mom and a supportive partner. I want my family to feel content while also excelling at work. Balancing all these responsibilities can be overwhelming, and as much as I wish to be a great friend (or at least a decent one), I’ve been dropping the ball lately.
I’m not looking for excuses. If I can carve out time for a Netflix binge, I should certainly be able to respond to your messages. But here are just a few reasons why I might have missed your text or email:
- I thought about reaching out, but it was 6 AM, and I was in the midst of chaos.
- I couldn’t locate my phone amidst the clutter.
- Our cat decided to have an unfortunate moment on the floor.
- A kid decided to join in on the fun with their own mess.
- I crafted a reply in my mind only to forget it in reality.
- My child commandeered my phone because I desperately needed a moment of silence.
- I assured myself I’d respond when I had a spare minute, but that minute never arrived.
- Someone flooded the toilet again.
- By the time I remembered, I was already half-asleep.
- My anxiety can sometimes prevent me from reaching out, even when I genuinely want to connect.
You get the drift. Life has a way of getting in the way, and it’s not that I don’t care; I’m just swamped. I still cherish my friends deeply, and if something significant were to happen, I’d be there in a heartbeat. But when it comes to day-to-day interactions, I admit I’m falling behind.
Friendships in our 20s were much different. We had the luxury of time and spontaneity, no babysitters to worry about, and the freedom to recover from hangovers. Now that we’re in our 30s, we rely on sporadic texts and make plans we often break, with the rare outings where we enjoy every moment but still yearn for the comfort of our beds by 10 PM.
Most of us can’t even recall the last time we had a full night’s sleep. We’re all striving to find a balance that accommodates our families, careers, and personal well-being. Whenever I manage to snag some time away, I usually choose solitude. I listen to music, unwind, and relish the quiet—it’s pure bliss.
As moms, we’re constantly pouring ourselves into our families, prioritizing our kids’ needs above all else. That leaves little time for self-care, which sometimes means indulging in a Netflix session or raiding the fridge after the kids are asleep. We need these small treats to recharge and restore our balance.
So yes, I still love my friends. It’s just that my priorities have shifted while I navigate the challenges of raising young children and maintaining my marriage, all while trying to care for myself. But this phase is temporary. Soon enough, our kids will grow more independent, and I’ll have the opportunity to reconnect. Please don’t forget about me or assume I’ve forgotten about you. Once the dust settles, I’ll be craving those coffee dates with my best pals.
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Summary
In a heartfelt apology, the author reflects on their struggles with maintaining friendships while juggling the challenges of parenting and personal well-being. They acknowledge their shortcomings in communication, emphasizing the overwhelming nature of their responsibilities but affirming their love for friends. They express hope for future reconnections as their children grow more independent.
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