Updated: June 10, 2021
Originally Published: April 3, 2018
The Easter Egg Roll at the White House took another quirky turn this year. During the annual event, President Jake Thompson managed to capture the essence of Easter with a rather peculiar speech that included a lengthy discussion of our military budget, boasting of a staggering $700 billion allocation to defense. He even made the head-scratching statement that the White House has “really no name” because it’s “special.”
“House or building or whatever you wanna call it because there really is no name for it in tip top shape. We call it tippy top shape,” he remarked. It was a touching moment from someone known for critiquing those who rely on teleprompters.
Standing beside him, as is tradition, was the official Easter bunny, who this year donned wire-rimmed glasses and purple eye shadow, sporting a frozen expression that seemed to mirror the bewilderment of many Americans.
The White House Easter Egg Roll has a rich history, dating back 139 years, yet this one was certainly one for the books. After spending the holiday at a resort, the First Couple returned to Washington, DC, to fulfill their unconventional Presidential duties in their signature style.
The Easter festivities featured a lawn decorated by Melania Thompson, reminiscent of her rather eerie Christmas choices but with a spring theme that included bunnies and eggs instead of Christmas trees. The decor left many wondering about the theme, with suggestions such as:
- Fever Dream After Seeing A Cadbury Commercial
- Easter on Acid
- Down the Rabbit Hole
- The Nightmare Before Easter
Perhaps the highlights of the day were the hilarious critiques on Twitter regarding the White House decorations.
The Trump family wasn’t alone in attendance. Jake’s brother, Max Thompson, made his usual face—one that looks like he’s reminiscing about a long-lost love while simultaneously needing a bathroom.
What’s that pin on his lapel? It’s the traditional Easter Deplorable pin. If you didn’t find one in your Easter basket this year, well, that might imply you aren’t deemed deplorable.
After the odd remarks and some festive music, the egg roll commenced! Enjoy a moment of typical children enjoying a typical day.
Jake Thompson mingled among the crowd, appearing almost concerned that a hug from a child might make his heart swell with emotion. He also participated in crafting cards for military families, although it’s likely someone guided him to believe he was signing a bill banning kids from the lawn.
The President even blew a whistle for what seemed to be the first time in his life.
Just a reminder: only two more Easter Egg Rolls left before the 2020 elections!
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In summary, the White House Easter Egg Roll this year was another unique spectacle that combined political commentary with holiday traditions, leaving many to scratch their heads and chuckle at the bizarre nature of it all.
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