I watched with a mix of anticipation and anxiety as my son, Jake, dribbled the basketball a few times at the free-throw line during his game. At 12 years old, he had just begun playing sports a year ago, and the learning curve had been steep. Organized sports were a late addition to his childhood, and grasping the rules had been quite the challenge.
As he prepared to shoot, I held my breath, knowing how overwhelming it can be to have all eyes on you. Jake has always been more reserved, and he once shared that he often sidesteps plays that could lead to fouls just to avoid shooting in front of an audience. From the sidelines, his coach called out, “You’ve got this, Jake! Remember our practice—focus!” Although he missed, Jake responded with a smile and a thumbs up, before turning back to the game.
Reflecting on the past, I remembered how anxious Jake had felt about trying out for the team. He had been so nervous that he cried on the way. When we arrived, a friend’s husband, who was involved in the league, made a point to ease his worries with some lighthearted jokes and introductions to other kids.
Once Jake was assigned to a team, his coach quickly recognized his hesitance. Week after week, he dedicated time to encourage Jake, correct his form, and boost his confidence on the court. They often stayed late after practice, running drills long past the scheduled end time. Despite having a full-time job and a family waiting at home, this coach showed up consistently, motivated by a belief in the kids’ potential. Importantly, he did this all voluntarily—without pay.
It’s incredible to see how far Jake has come in just a year. He not only made it to the free throw line but also managed to sink a basket with his second shot. This progress often comes to mind when I receive emails about practice times that may not fit perfectly into our schedule. It serves as a reminder that coaches also have busy lives, juggling work and family responsibilities while selflessly dedicating time to our children’s development.
As parents, it’s crucial to avoid being the ones who criticize coaches from the sidelines. Yelling at them during games only reflects poorly on us. Instead, we should respect their authority and allow them to guide our children’s learning experiences. This means accepting that there may be different approaches to playing the game and understanding that each child will learn in their unique way.
I sometimes find myself guilty of not volunteering to help with minor tasks like keeping score or managing equipment at games. While I may get frustrated with practice schedules, it’s important to remember that coaches are doing their best with limited resources. They are not just teaching skills but also instilling teamwork and resilience in our kids.
Jake’s confidence has grown tremendously, thanks to the constructive feedback from his coach. When I see him practicing shooting hoops at home because his coach suggested he improve his layup, I refrain from stepping in to demonstrate my own technique.
Always keep in mind that your child’s coach is offering their time freely for the benefit of the team. Consider bringing snacks for the players or assisting with game logistics. Most importantly, acknowledge their efforts; coaching is often a thankless job. They invest emotionally in team outcomes, celebrating victories and processing losses alongside the kids.
Next time you pick your child up from practice, take a moment to express gratitude to their coach. Modeling respect for coaches teaches our children valuable lessons about teamwork and appreciation. It’s a win-win for everyone involved.
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Summary:
Understanding and respecting your child’s coach is essential for fostering a positive sports experience. Coaches selflessly dedicate their time to teach and develop young athletes, often without compensation. By supporting them and modeling respect, parents can contribute to a nurturing environment for their children’s growth in sports.

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