Ten Misconceptions I Had About Parenting Before I Became a Parent

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Judgment is a complex aspect of human behavior. While we often hope for understanding, we frequently find ourselves casting judgments on others as if it were second nature. I must confess that I fell into this trap, particularly regarding parents with young children—back when I had no experience in parenting myself. I’d like to extend my sincerest apologies to all the parents out there for my earlier misconceptions. Here are the ten things I judged:

1. Bribery
   Prior to parenthood, I thought, “Giving a cookie to keep a child in the shopping cart? That’s ridiculous! Children should be obedient just because.”
   Now that I’m a parent, I find myself packing a variety of snacks for every store visit, offering them to keep my child seated. Apparently, compliance doesn’t just come from authority!
2. Child Leashes
   Before I was a parent, I believed the concept of child leashes was preposterous, equating it to treating kids like animals.
   Now, however, I see the potential benefits of keeping a wandering toddler close, especially in crowded places. I haven’t used one yet, but I certainly understand the appeal.
3. Screaming
   In my pre-parent days, I would think, “Why don’t they just stop their child from screaming?”
   As a parent, I’ve learned that my instinct is to abandon my cart and flee a store during such outbursts. I’m working on managing these situations better, but it’s a continual learning process.
4. Naps
   Before having children, I questioned why parents would plan their day around naps.
   Now, I meticulously schedule every activity to ensure my child can nap at home. Missing a nap can derail an entire day, and I deeply regret my previous thoughts.
5. Rigid Schedules
   I used to assume that parents could easily adjust their plans for a lunch outing without issue.
   Now, I understand that adhering to a schedule provides my child with a sense of security. Thus, I prioritize my son’s routine above all else.
6. Traveling
   Prior to becoming a parent, I thought spontaneous travel was a breeze—just pack the car seat!
   Now, I rarely travel at all. My one attempt was a disaster, with sleepless nights and endless preparations proving far more complex than anticipated.
7. Protectiveness
   Before parenting, I questioned why parents wouldn’t let their kids play outside or leave them with babysitters.
   Now, I’m hyper-aware of potential dangers and guard my son closely. The protective instincts that emerged upon becoming a parent are profound.
8. Germs
   In my earlier mindset, I thought germs were harmless and helped build immunity.
   As a parent, I’m now hyper-vigilant about cleanliness, carrying sanitizer everywhere and even using it on my child’s clothes. Illness is no joke!
9. Messy Faces
   Before, I found it hard to understand why parents didn’t clean their child’s face regularly.
   Now, I realize that there are not enough wet wipes in existence to keep my son’s face clean, and I sometimes resort to using my own spit to tidy him up!
10. Restaurant Etiquette
    I once couldn’t believe how parents allowed their kids to create messes while dining out.
    Now, I find myself apologizing profusely for the chaos we leave behind. It’s simply challenging to enforce etiquette with young children.

Reflecting on my earlier judgments makes me realize how naive I was. Parenthood has undoubtedly changed my perspective and made me more empathetic. To all the parents, please forgive my past judgments. And to those who aren’t parents yet, remember that understanding is key—let’s offer each other grace, as we’re all navigating our unique challenges.

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Summary:

Judging parents before experiencing parenthood can often lead to misconceptions. As I reflect on my previous thoughts regarding parenting, I realize the profound changes that come with the role. From understanding the need for snacks and schedules to realizing the importance of cleanliness and protection, my views have evolved significantly. Parenthood teaches empathy and understanding, and it’s crucial to offer support rather than judgment.