The tragic stories we hear about children left in cars often leave us feeling shaken. The headline “Child left in car, dies” strikes a nerve deep within, prompting us to wonder, “What kind of parent could do this?” The unsettling truth is: any parent can find themselves in this position, and I nearly became one of them.
As a new mother of two under two, my life was a whirlwind. My daughter was just 18 months old, and my son was a mere ten days old. For those who’ve experienced the early days of a newborn, you know how disorienting they can be. The first month is a blur where day and night lose their meaning. A friend once advised me, “Forget about taking it day by day; focus on minute by minute.”
My son would only sleep when I cradled him in my arms, bouncing him while I sang a slightly edited version of “Nothing but a G Thang.” Meanwhile, my daughter, newly transitioned from being an only child, decided that this was the perfect time to embrace the Terrible Twos. Between my son’s brief naps, she was ready to explore the world, demanding my attention.
On a particularly chaotic day, we returned home from a coffee run. I was overwhelmed—I needed to use the restroom, my daughter was fussing over a blueberry muffin, my phone was ringing, and the radio was blaring. In the midst of it all, I forgot my son.
It was alarmingly easy to overlook the sleeping baby nestled in his rear-facing car seat. It wasn’t until I felt the discomfort of my full breasts and the unmistakable letdown reflex that I remembered my newborn. “There but for the Grace of God go I,” I repeated as I lifted him into my arms, feeling the warmth of his head against my shoulder.
I am not the perfect parent. I love my children and strive to do my best, understanding that motherhood is a precious gift. For those parents who have tragically forgotten their children, it’s crucial to recognize that they likely did not intend for such a nightmare to occur. We’re all human, and it only takes one sleepless night, a shift in routine, or distractions like a ringing phone to cause forgetfulness.
So how do we prevent such a tragedy?
After my close call, I devised several strategies to keep my children top of mind:
- Place Important Items in the Backseat: By putting your purse or phone in the back, you’ll be forced to check that area when you finish driving.
- Engage with Your Child: Talk to your baby, even if they’re asleep. This constant reminder helps you remember they’re there.
- Set Daily Reminders: Use your phone to schedule alerts that remind you to check for your kids.
- Involve Someone Else: Arrange a system where a family member verifies that all kids are accounted for at drop-off points.
- Leave a Toy in the Front Seat: By placing a toy or diaper bag next to you, you’ll have a visual cue to remember your child.
- Winter and Summer Tricks: In cold weather, leave your jacket in the back. In summer, leave a shoe behind. These items will serve as reminders that you have a child with you.
- Use Technology: With the rising incidents of these tragedies, various gadgets with alarms and sensors have been created to assist parents in remembering their children.
It’s easy to believe we’re not “that kind of parent.” But I assure you, the parents who have forgotten their children likely thought the same.
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In summary, the overwhelming responsibilities of parenting can blur our focus, leading to mistakes that can have tragic outcomes. By implementing small but effective reminders, we can help ensure that we never forget our greatest treasures.
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