As the month dedicated to autism awareness unfolds, my emotions are complex. I’m not disheartened by my child’s diagnosis itself; rather, it’s the myriad of challenges that accompany autism that weigh heavily on me. The relentless anxiety, the compulsive behaviors, the issues with sensory processing, the boundless energy, and the intellectual disabilities are the facets of autism that often remain unaddressed in the mainstream narrative.
During this month, my social media feeds are filled with uplifting quotes and inspiring success stories of individuals on the spectrum showcasing remarkable talents. While I appreciate these narratives, they often paint a one-dimensional picture that feels distant from my own reality. My son, now almost 13, still clings to childhood beliefs like Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny. He finds comfort in watching Baby Einstein to relax and his room resembles a chaotic mess that could rival the aftermath of a train wreck.
I don’t mourn the absence of typical teenage interests in his life; I often wonder what those even are. Are they really all that mysterious, or simply preoccupied with things like hunting for rare Blue’s Clues DVDs on eBay?
What truly saddens me is the stress that overshadows even the most straightforward plans. The need to prepare for every possible scenario in case things don’t go as hoped can be overwhelming. There are days when I hesitate to venture out at all, and convincing both him and myself to step outside our comfort zone is a battle. My son has an uncanny ability to sense my uncertainty, and I wish I could just share a happy moment without needing to prep him with a social story.
For every uplifting story shared by friends, I can’t help but wonder if they comprehend the daily realities we face—the worries, the stress, and the frustrations that are all too real. It’s a narrative that seldom finds its way into mainstream media. This isn’t fake news; it’s our life.
While I appreciate those who engage with this topic, I sometimes wish more people could truly understand. I’d welcome them into our home, but even that idea brings its own set of stressors—unless they come bearing fries, of course!
This is the aspect of autism that I wish to highlight during this month of awareness.
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In summary, the realities of autism extend far beyond the inspirational stories often shared. They encompass a daily struggle filled with anxiety and challenges that deserve recognition and understanding.
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