I’ll be honest: my partner and I permit tablets at the dinner table. Yes, even during lunch. And if I’m really truthful, there have been mornings when I’ve served up cartoons alongside my kids’ cereal. Some days are just a struggle to get through, especially when I’m still reeling from the chaos of the night before or when my early-rising kids leave me completely drained before I’ve even had my first cup of coffee.
Before anyone jumps in to criticize my parenting choices or show pity for my kids, let me clarify. I don’t believe that screens should accompany every meal, every day. However, with a 7-year-old and twin 5-year-olds, plus two full-time working parents, some days are about mere survival. A friend wisely pointed out that tablets can be one of the many “coping mechanisms” we utilize as parents. Allowing some screen time at meals occasionally can help us all make it through.
I have felt a twinge of guilt for not being the kind of parent who insists on no distractions at mealtime or for not sticking to the ideal even when I’m utterly exhausted. So, I turned to social media to ask friends about their stance on screens during meals. Maybe I was seeking reassurance—perhaps someone would share their own tales that would help me feel less guilty on those particularly tough days.
Most people who responded were adamant about maintaining a no-screens rule during meal times. They emphasized that dinner is often the only time families can sit together for more than a few moments, connect, share stories, and engage in spontaneous conversations that wouldn’t happen otherwise. Some even argued that having a book at the table disrupted family time! Are magazines and catalogs not included in that? Because I often find myself flipping through those while reminding my child for the umpteenth time to chew with her mouth closed.
Interestingly, many who were strict about their no-screens policy admitted to bending the rules when dining out. Parents often resorted to handing their kids a tablet or phone to keep them entertained while waiting for their food, fearing they would disturb other diners or simply because waiting can be excruciating for little ones. Yes, crayons and toys can help, but let’s be real—what usually holds my kids’ attention longer is a snack or a screen. I certainly don’t want them to fill up on breadsticks before I’m slapped with a hefty bill for a plate of macaroni and cheese.
There’s a local restaurant we enjoy that has TVs at every table. It’s honestly a lifesaver. We don’t go often, but on days when we need a break from cooking, we can order food, and the kids can zone out to Disney Junior. In the meantime, my partner and I can discuss important things like home repairs and our soccer schedule, while the kids happily eat and stay quiet. It’s a win-win, and I don’t mind the screen being part of the equation.
In my informal survey, I found it curious that nearly everyone mentioned family movie nights often included dinner in front of the TV. Watching a movie while eating is still screen time, bending the rules they claim to uphold. And that’s perfectly fine—sometimes we all need to bend the rules a little.
I just hope that those rule-bending parents don’t judge others who also allow screens at meals. Some families, particularly those with children who are sensory sensitive or have special needs, rely on screens to navigate dinner or outings. We don’t always know the circumstances others face, nor is it our place to judge.
For those parents who also find screens a staple at mealtime, let go of any guilt or need to explain your choices. You don’t have to justify how you parent to anyone. Parenting is tough enough without the added weight of judgment. We’re all striving to raise happy, healthy kids, and a little screen time at dinner isn’t going to undo the hard work we all put in.
In conclusion, occasional screen time during meals is not a detriment to our parenting; rather, it’s a tool that helps us navigate the chaos of family life.
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