I’ve recently come across a parenting trend, mainly through social media, suggesting that some parents don’t encourage their children to share. I can’t help but think that this approach could lead to a generation of entitled and self-centered individuals. It struck me as odd, prompting me to delve deeper into these philosophies.
One aspect of the millennial generation that I admire is their inclination to question traditional norms. Gender roles are evolving, consent is emphasized, and practices like circumcision are being reconsidered based on necessity rather than tradition.
While some articles present compelling arguments against teaching children to share, I remain unconvinced. Instilling the value of sharing in my kids feels fundamentally right. In many parents’ views, sharing a toy with an unfamiliar child doesn’t reflect “real-world” scenarios. Sure, the world has its share of difficult individuals, but that doesn’t mean I want my children to become one of them. I aspire to raise compassionate human beings.
At a recent playdate, for instance, a baby crawled over and took a toy from my toddler, who reacted with an intense outburst. As the tension in the room escalated, I calmly reassured her, “It’s okay. The little ones are still learning about sharing.” Although I stand by my response, I realize that not every parent might appreciate my approach.
Another incident occurred at the library when my son and another boy started tussling over a toy. Just as I was about to step in and help them express their feelings, the other mother dismissed me, believing her child’s ability to self-regulate was superior. While that’s fine for her, I hope she’s ready for the challenges that come with a more spirited child. I let her manage the situation, recognizing that real-life experiences will shape their interactions.
I’ve found that my parenting style is not as consistent as I once thought. I adjust my involvement based on the situation, but my ultimate goal remains the same: to nurture compassion in my children. If I notice my kids behaving selfishly, I make it a point to intervene more decisively next time.
Think about it: if you were at a train station, lost in your thoughts, and someone asked to borrow your headphones, wouldn’t that feel off? Or if you’re at a sports bar, sharing cheese curds with friends, and a stranger asks for some, it’s a little creepy, right? However, if they simply wanted to use the dartboard when you were done, that seems acceptable. Kids don’t yet grasp these nuances.
The mindset of sharing everything becomes outdated as we transition into adulthood. Children naturally focus on their own needs, and it’s our role as parents to guide them toward considering the feelings of others. I aim to help my kids think of others as much as they think of themselves. This foundational lesson in sharing, though challenging, shapes their instincts toward compassion.
Children are far more adaptable than we often give them credit for. We continuously learn and unlearn throughout life, adjusting our understanding based on new experiences. Initially, we learn to greet everyone, then we’re advised to be cautious with strangers. We’re taught to be polite, then to assert ourselves. We learn that letters and numbers are distinct, and later master algebra.
So, while I’m teaching my kids the importance of sharing, I recognize the different approaches others may take. If you prefer to empower your children to stand firm on their belongings, that’s your choice, and I respect it. I’ll continue on my path, and you can walk yours.
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In summary, while parenting philosophies may differ, my belief in teaching children to share stems from a desire to cultivate empathy and compassion. I understand that not everyone will agree with my methods, but I’m committed to fostering a caring mindset in my kids.
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