Trigger warning: suicide, bullying
Recently, a tragic story emerged about a local girl who took her own life at just 16 years old, reportedly after being bullied. Reading about her loss shattered my heart. I couldn’t help but think of her mother, who believed her daughter was going for a walk, only to have her world turned upside down when she never returned. The discovery of her hanging in a park left many questions lingering in the air. How much pain was she in? Was she seeking help? Did her family know what she was going through? Did she have a support system? What could have changed the outcome?
The anguish this mother must be feeling is unfathomable. Losing a child is a nightmare, particularly when that loss stems from the cruelty of bullying. This issue is particularly pressing in our household as my 4th grader has faced his own share of bullying. Although things had quieted down recently, that changed last night.
A note was left for my son at our front door after a knock.
“Dear J,
Hello! We meet again. No offense, but you’re annoying. Learn to make more friends like boys, not girls. Stop acting like a girl. Learn to sing better. Stop talking to girls. We’re coming after you.”
He found it, read it, and set it on the kitchen counter. I wish he hadn’t.
When I walked in for a snack, he handed me the note. As I read it through tears, shock washed over me. The neighborhood girls he had played with just the day before felt compelled to craft such a hurtful message for my sweet, gentle 9-year-old. What led them to believe this was acceptable? Did they want him to feel bad? What was their goal? It confuses me that these girls, who had been at our home enjoying snacks, suddenly turned against him.
That night, he shed a few tears. His sadness plunged me into an emotional breakdown. When he said, “I should have known better,” my heart sank. No. No child should ever feel that way. My anger surged, and since then, I’ve been a mess. There’s no handbook for dealing with bullies, so my husband and I are committed to addressing this head-on. No child deserves to be bullied for simply being themselves. It’s 2019; we need to do better.
This situation might be affecting me more than him. My anxiety manifests in physical symptoms, and I feel unwell. While he may not be displaying his emotions outwardly, I worry about how these experiences will shape him as he grows.
The moral of this story is simple: Teach your kids kindness. Encourage them to refrain from writing hurtful notes to others. Every child is unique, and conversations about bullying are vital. I will not allow my son to become just another statistic.
We are mothers—united in our mission to protect our children. We are more than just moms; we are partners, friends, and advocates. If you’re looking for support beyond parenting, check out our other pieces, like those on home insemination kits, which can be a valuable resource for many. You can find more information at Make A Mom or explore Facts About Fertility for insightful articles.
In summary, bullying remains a serious issue that can have lasting effects. As parents, we need to foster open dialogue about kindness and empathy, ensuring that our children feel supported and understood. We must work together to create a safer environment for all kids, so they don’t become statistics.
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