Hilarity Guaranteed!
The Only Chuck Norris Jokes Chuck Norris Approves Of
When Chuck Norris entered the world, he took the wheel and drove his mother home from the hospital.
By Jamie Thompson
Updated: August 1, 2024
Originally Published: October 15, 2019
Before he became an internet sensation, Chuck Norris was already a household name as Texas Ranger Cordell Walker, a sheriff with a heart of gold who cleaned up crime in his town. The original tough guy, if you haven’t seen him deliver a swift kick to an opponent, you’re missing out. His reputation for strength and charisma is what sparked countless jokes about him, and if you’re in search of some side-splitting Chuck Norris humor, you’ve hit the jackpot!
For those who grew up in the digital age, it’s clear that the internet serves two main purposes: sharing Chuck Norris jokes and… well, that’s about it! With over-the-top feats of strength and bravado, these Chuck Norris facts create a ludicrous collection of accomplishments that will have you rolling with laughter. And if you’re looking for something that packs a punch, you know Chuck Norris is the answer. Here are some of the most entertaining Chuck Norris jokes to brighten your day.
If you’re in the mood for more humor about things that kick, check out our collection of donkey jokes, horse jokes, kangaroo jokes, and more for kids!
- Chuck Norris doesn’t flush the toilet; he intimidates it into self-cleaning.
- When Chuck Norris slices onions, the onions shed tears of fear.
- Chuck Norris counted to infinity—twice.
- When the boogeyman sleeps, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
- Time doesn’t pass for Chuck Norris; it waits patiently for him.
- Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
- Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.
- Chuck Norris knows the real reason Waldo is hiding.
- Chuck Norris has never blinked in his life—not even once.
- Chuck Norris can cook minute rice in half that time.
And the list goes on, with each joke more outrageous than the last. Whether it’s Chuck Norris winning a staring contest with his eyes closed or making a snowman out of fire, these jokes are a testament to his legendary status.
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In summary, Chuck Norris jokes continue to entertain and amuse audiences with their absurdity, capturing the essence of why he remains an enduring icon. From his unforgettable one-liners to his mythical feats, Chuck Norris is a legend in both action and humor.
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