We thought we were being responsible parents by giving our kids Kindle Fires instead of iPads. After all, they didn’t know how to access YouTube, and we had kept them away from screens for so long. However, it didn’t take long for my once TV-free children to become utterly captivated by Disney Plus and video games. The sight of it brings tears to my eyes, but I feel powerless to stop it.
I used to be that parent who enforced strict limits on electronics. Television time was minimal, and I only reluctantly allowed an ancient 8-bit Nintendo into our home. My kids spent their free hours drawing, reading, and building with LEGOs. They played outside without needing any encouragement. They were imaginative, and they still are, but things have changed.
With my older sons engaged in their various activities, it became all too tempting to hand my youngest the tablet. It was a simple transition from educational games like Teach Your Monster to the addictive Angry Birds. Before I knew it, they were obsessed, constantly clamoring to play. My youngest, in particular, had a tendency to become screen-addicted. They would huddle together on the couch, engrossed in Angry Birds discussions that seemed to never end.
With my husband’s chronic illness and my constant work commitments, keeping the kids entertained has become a challenge. When they needed to relax, it was easy to extend their screen time from half an hour to an hour or more. Their love for Star Wars led us to subscribe to Disney Plus for The Mandalorian, but now they’re fixated on Gravity Falls, and while the Twin Peaks jokes are amusing, I often find myself wishing we could just smash the TV.
They talk about these shows endlessly, draw characters from them, and even choose them as topics for their school assignments, unlike when they used to write about lizards, toads, and even Macbeth (thanks to the comic book version my oldest loves).
On days when my husband is away, I’ve implemented a no-screens policy. They can only watch TV if it’s an educational documentary, and tablets are strictly for schoolwork. Yet, they still ask repeatedly, knowing my limits. My youngest even counts down the hours until his father returns, not merely because he misses him, but because he knows he’ll get screen time then. He’d rather sit on concrete bleachers with a tablet than play at home.
They hardly touch their Keva blocks anymore, and while they do play outside and engage with LEGOs, I can’t shake the feeling that they’re losing their creativity. You might be thinking, “You’re the parent; set the rules and stick to them!” If only it were that simple.
I know what needs to change: I need to work less, and my husband needs to get better. But here we are, hanging by a thread, doing the best we can. They’re becoming increasingly dull, almost zombie-like, with their singular focus on screens. The oldest still reads, but the younger two are indifferent. If I deny them access to screens, I’ve seen them sit in silence for extended periods, as if they don’t know how to entertain themselves anymore.
I suggest activities and even offer to join them, but it usually leads to a struggle. Forcing them into something rarely meets with enthusiasm. I often fantasize about gathering all the electronics and smashing them to bits.
Just the other day, my eight-year-old asked if he could use his tablet. Frustrated, I snapped that I was writing about their screen obsession right at that moment. “Why do you have to write about that?!” he replied, flopping back on the couch. “I haven’t been on a screen like, all day.” He had just returned from his grandmother’s, where I can only imagine he spent hours staring at a screen.
I feel like I’m losing the battle against electronics, and it’s disheartening.
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Summary:
The author reflects on the struggles of parenting in a digital age, where their children, once free from screens, have now become obsessed with electronics. Despite efforts to limit their screen time and encourage creativity, the allure of tablets and TV has transformed their kids into screen-obsessed ‘zombies.’ The narrative highlights the challenges of balancing work, family, and the influence of technology on children’s lives.
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