A few days ago, I shared a snapshot on my blog’s Facebook page of me playing a Humpty Dumpty game with my five-year-old, Max, while I was on a break between Zoom meetings. In the meantime, my partner, Lisa, was in the other room, trying to help our ten-year-old daughter, Zoe, who had just experienced a meltdown over her math homework. Amidst the chaos, Max persistently asked Lisa to play a game, prompting me to step in and assist wherever I could. Earlier that morning, I was also helping our thirteen-year-old son, Alex, stay accountable with his schoolwork while juggling my own professional responsibilities.
The purpose of my post was to highlight our new reality, but I was taken aback by the responses. Many women remarked that their husbands, now working remotely, were not contributing at all to the homeschooling efforts. One comment mentioned a husband who would retreat to the bedroom and lock the door, while his wife, also working full-time from home, was left to manage homeschooling their five children alone. I’ll just say it outright: that’s not okay, man.
I understand that these are stressful times. I work at a university that faced significant financial losses due to COVID-19, leading to discussions about layoffs and budget cuts. Like many, I’m anxious about job security and have taken on extra projects to stand out and help solidify my position. However, none of this justifies neglecting your role in homeschooling.
If both you and your partner are working from home, remember that she is facing similar pressures. Guys, it’s time to find ways to contribute. Yes, it might require adjusting your hours to work in the evening or waking up earlier to tackle tasks before the school day starts. It could mean setting up your workspace in the kitchen, answering emails while assisting your child with math. Consider coordinating with your partner to establish a schedule that allows both of you to work effectively while helping the kids.
Of course, some jobs may demand uninterrupted focus, but I would argue that those instances are rare, especially now when many employers are more accommodating than ever. After all, they’re experiencing similar challenges.
In our household, Lisa typically works with the younger two kids first thing in the morning since their assignments are less demanding. This allows her to dive into her job later in the day while I support our teenager, Alex, who is capable but often needs encouragement. I set up a desk in his closet, and we outline his tasks each morning, establishing time limits and using timers to keep him focused. During my Zoom meetings, I close the door and expect him to stay on track, which can be a work in progress. But generally, I can steer him back on course after my calls.
By early afternoon, all the kids are done with their work and playing outside.
Working alongside Lisa on our children’s education has not only strengthened my bond with them, especially Alex, but it has also improved our relationship as partners. While I would prefer our previous routine of office work and school, collaborating on schoolwork has allowed us to recognize our strengths and weaknesses as parents and thrive together.
Life right now feels like a blend of family, work, and education, with each day presenting surprises. I never know which family member might pop up during my online meetings or who will need assistance with their homework. Like everyone else, I’m trying to balance my professional life with parenting duties. However, it is manageable, and it’s crucial to share the load with your partner.
Fellas, I know this message might come across as a reprimand, but that’s not my intent. My goal is to encourage you to sit down with your partner and discuss how to approach homeschooling as a team. Don’t hide away in a corner of the house. Get involved, review the schedule, and determine how you can help. It’s not as daunting as it seems, and it will ultimately benefit your family and strengthen your marriage.
For further insights and support, you might want to check out this post here. For additional resources on home insemination, visit Make A Mom. If you’re interested in pregnancy topics, the CDC offers excellent guidance.
Summary
Dads working from home must actively participate in their children’s homeschooling to share the burden and strengthen family bonds. Adjusting work hours and collaborating on schedules can help balance professional and parenting responsibilities.
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