When my children were born, my partner and I were deeply entrenched in our faith, adhering to a tradition that insisted on giving our kids names derived from saints. True believers don’t just slip a saint’s name in the middle; they put it front and center, often resulting in elaborate combinations like Mary Elizabeth Catherine or Catherine Elizabeth Mary. We opted for simpler triple names, concluding with two family names, but all three of my sons ended up with names tied to religion.
In hindsight, I would reconsider two of those choices.
The First Name I Cherish, Despite Its Religious Roots
Our eldest’s name is quite uncommon: Saint Blaise, which ranked #977 in popularity at the time of his birth. We have yet to encounter another child with the same name. While it requires spelling, it’s straightforward and not one that immediately screams, “My mom wants me to be a priest.” Most importantly, it suits him perfectly, and people often smile when they hear it.
Not Condemning Religious Names, Just My Choices
I’m not against religious names entirely; my issue stems from my departure from the faith that influenced those choices. At the time, we felt compelled to give our sons saintly names, but now I wish I could rewind and rethink. It’s not something anyone anticipates when they’re naming their children, especially when it comes to a faith that feels all-consuming. When we left, it was like being lost at sea for a long time.
Regardless of our current beliefs, I find myself regretting the impact that faith had on my children’s names—it dictated that they should carry such heavily religious monikers.
A Name Linked to a Misogynist Figure
For my second son, we chose Saint Augustine, but as I learned more about his past, I discovered some troubling views on women, which we initially overlooked. The name is often mispronounced and confused for a girl’s name. While we typically shorten it to August, which I adore, the religious connotation lingers, making me wish I had chosen a name that felt more in tune with my current values.
In fact, I often fantasize about naming him something more whimsical, like Moon or Ember, reflecting a more free-spirited vibe. And before anyone suggests, “What about your partner’s input?” I did all the hard work—carrying him, enduring morning sickness, and managing my health. I claim the naming rights. Yet, that religion instilled a sense of subservience in me, which played a role in our naming decisions.
The Most Religious Name of All for Our Youngest
If I could change one name, it would be my youngest’s, who bears the most religious name imaginable: Simon Peter. You know, the famous apostle from biblical times. People often congratulated us on this choice at the time. However, now I would have opted for something entirely different. His name lacks a nickname, and when I hear it, a wave of regret washes over me. Although I once appreciated the connection to a character from Lord of the Flies, the full name now feels like a heavy reminder of a faith I no longer identify with.
We may no longer practice that religion, but our sons’ names will always carry that legacy. I often wish they could have names like Sky, River, or even Panamint—something that feels more aligned with who we are now. The regret lingers every time I hear a unique baby name.
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In summary, while I value the unique name of my eldest son, I often find myself wishing I could change the names of my other two boys, which carry heavy religious connotations that I no longer embrace. The journey of naming our children has left me with a sense of regret, particularly as I come across names that resonate more with my current beliefs.
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