By: Amara Jones
Updated: Feb. 12, 2021
Originally Published: Feb. 12, 2021
The moment when Kamala Harris and former First Lady Michelle Obama exchanged a double fist bump at the inauguration was nothing short of historic. Witnessing this exchange between the first Black and Southeast Asian woman to take the Vice Presidency and the first Black woman to hold the role of First Lady was powerful. Yet, for Black women across the nation, the essence of that moment transcended words. It encapsulated a bond of sisterhood, understanding, and solidarity—a silent acknowledgment that resonated deeply.
Living as a Black woman in America is a unique experience that is difficult to fully grasp unless you have lived it. We navigate a complex intersection of race and gender, often feeling the weight of this dual burden. It can be both emotionally draining and mentally taxing, making it challenging to convey to those who haven’t walked this path. However, friendships among Black women often come with an inherent understanding that fosters a profound connection.
This shared journey serves as the bedrock for an unbreakable bond filled with empathy, acceptance, and love. It is an understanding of the subtle battles we face and the shared experiences we endure. In each other, we find acceptance without pretense, allowing us to drop the masks we wear in everyday life. This unconditional love empowers us to be our authentic selves without needing to offer explanations.
Contrary to what some media outlets may portray—suggesting that relationships among Black women are fraught with drama—the reality is far different. Our friendships are rooted in a shared history that blurs the lines between family and friends, modeled by the women who came before us.
Reflecting on my childhood, I recognize that the need for sisterhood has always been a part of my identity. In elementary school, I was part of a tight-knit group of girls known as the “four musketeers.” We were four inseparable Black girls who shared everything from school days to sleepovers and matching outfits. In high school, I joined a sorority called the Marquettes, cultivating deep friendships that allowed us to celebrate, grieve, and navigate the trials of adolescence together. To this day, I can reach out to any of these women and pick up our friendship as if no time has passed.
As a mother, I sought the same sisterhood in a group called Mocha Moms, where I found camaraderie with other Black mothers. The truth is that we face distinct challenges in raising Black children that our non-Black peers may never fully comprehend. My sister friends understand my concerns about school quality, the implications of interracial dating, and the perceptions my children might encounter in unfamiliar environments.
Black women are acutely aware that we are moving through a predominantly white, male landscape. Historically, we have fought diligently to carve out our place in spaces that often do not welcome us. The mental and emotional toll of that struggle can be draining, and sometimes we simply want friends who understand without needing to explain.
Sisterhood among Black women provides a comforting safety net. We can express ourselves without the fear of being misinterpreted, judged as overly aggressive, or having our abilities underestimated. In these friendships, we can embrace our softer, more vulnerable sides without worrying about fitting into stereotypes of the “strong Black woman” or the “angry Black woman.” Our sisters see us for the complex individuals we truly are.
Black women need champions, and no one advocates for a Black woman quite like another Black woman. Our ability to uplift each other is unmatched, and our communication can convey a multitude of sentiments with just a glance or a simple “Girl.” The term “Sis” alone can serve as a question, a gentle reprimand, or a rallying cry.
This isn’t to say that Black women can’t have friendships with women of other races; that couldn’t be further from the truth. Building a community with diverse backgrounds is important. However, the sisterhood formed among Black women serves as an essential sanctuary that we should never feel the need to justify.
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In summary, the bond between Black women is a powerful force rooted in shared experiences and unspoken understanding. It is a source of strength, comfort, and empowerment. Celebrating this sisterhood is essential, as it fosters a space where we can be our true selves without fear of judgment.
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