If you’ve ever dined at a seafood restaurant, you might remember the experience of selecting your own lobster from the tank. It’s a popular choice, especially on television! However, you probably discovered a crucial truth: not all lobsters are the same. Typically, they’re priced by weight, so if you picked a hefty one, you likely enjoyed a pricey meal. On the other hand, if you went with a smaller lobster, you may have found yourself hungry soon after. But hey, at least your wallet stayed fuller! And if you were at a place like Red Lobster, you could fill up on those delicious cheddar biscuits. Those awkward lobster dinner moments may not have been funny at the time, but we’re here to turn that around with some laughter. Get ready for a collection of lobster puns and jokes that will bring on the giggles!
Lobster Puns:
- Lobsters prefer their morning clawfee piping hot.
- When answering the phone, a lobster says, “Shello?”
- Lobsters love celebrating holidays because it’s the sea-son.
- One lobster cried because his teacher called him lost claws.
- The lobster struggling in school was failing algae-bra.
- A lobster left home due to pier pressure.
- The lady lobster wore seashells because she outgrew her B-shells.
- The lobster asked its catfish buddy, “Who is your cod-father?”
- Someone searched for lobster in Portland but couldn’t find any—such a bummer since lobster is a Maine attraction!
- The lobster lost its fortune because it was shelling out money.
- Lobsters are terrible friends; they’re too shellfish!
- A lobster reported a crime and was asked to be more Pacific.
- When a lobster was about to propose, his friend asked if he was shore.
- During a lobster wedding, the groom called his spouse his “butter half.”
- One lobster mentioned he was diving into boiling water, and everyone thought he was cray-sea.
- At a farewell party, a lobster told his colleague he was one shell of a guy.
- The lobster found it hard to retire because he was tide to his job.
- After snapping at a friend, the lobster apologized, saying he was just salty.
- The crustacean playing tennis was a real lob-star.
- A lobster’s signature shot? The lob!
- If you cross a lobster with a telephone, you’ll get snappy talk.
- Expecting a crucial call, the lobster crabbed the phone.
- The ocean didn’t say anything to the lobster; it just waved.
- The lobster turned red because of the sea weed.
Lobster Jokes:
- I dined at Mary Poppins’ restaurant last night… the super cauliflower cheese was great, but the lobster was atrocious.
- Why are lobsters terrible at sharing? Because they’re shellfish!
- What do you call a lobster with claustrophobia? Claws-trophobic.
- What do you call a tired lobster? A frustracean.
- I asked a seafood restaurant how they prepare their lobsters. The waiter replied, “We tell him the truth, man. ‘This is the end of the line.’”
- A man saw a sign for “Lobster Tails, $5” and thought it was a deal. He paid the vendor, who then started telling a story: “Once upon a time, there was this lobster…”
- Did you hear about the fight at Red Lobster? Four fish were battered!
- Who brings gifts to good lobsters on Christmas? Santa Claws.
- How much salt do lobsters use when cooking pasta? Just a pinch.
- Where do lobsters usually work in a bakery? At the crust station.
- One lobster took another on a date and said, “I’ll pay for dinner, it’s be-claws I love you.”
- What do you call a famous lobster? A shellebrity.
- Where do crabs and lobsters park? At the bustacean.
- Why did the lobster visit the physical therapist? It pulled a mussel.
- A man ordered lobster for dinner and complained, “This lobster only has one claw!” The waiter replied, “That lobster was in a fight.” “Okay, bring me the winner!”
- Why couldn’t the woman eat shrimp, lobsters, and clams cooked with steam? She has shellfish steam issues.
- What do you call a crab that throws things? A lobster.
- Where does a lobster keep its clothes? In the clawset.
- Why was the ocean screaming? You’d scream too if you had lobsters on your bottom!
- Did you hear about the lobster that rode a sea mammal into battle? He did it on porpoise.
- Where are there no hipster lobsters? In the Maine stream.
- Where do lobsters go to borrow money? To the prawn brokers.
- What’s the perfect name for a pet lobster? Clawde.
- Did you hear about the fight between blue and red lobsters? It was like a sea-n from a movie.
- What’s worse than lobsters on your piano? Crabs on your organ.
- Where do lobsters wait for the bus? At the bustacean.
If you enjoyed these puns and jokes, there’s plenty more to explore! For additional laughs and insights, check out this other blog post we have. And if you’re looking for ways to enhance your fertility journey, resources like this authority on fertility supplements can be incredibly helpful. Plus, the UCSF Center offers excellent guidance on pregnancy and home insemination.
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In summary, these lobster puns and jokes are sure to add a splash of humor to your next seafood feast and help lighten the mood if you’ve ever faced a disappointing lobster dinner.
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