On March 25, news outlets worldwide reported the passage of New Zealand’s new legislation, which grants women and their partners three days of paid leave following a miscarriage or stillbirth. Initially, I was filled with hope. This is a significant acknowledgment that pregnancy loss is a reality that needs recognition and a period of healing, both physically and emotionally. Ginny Anderson, the Parliament member behind the bill, articulated the sentiment perfectly: “The bill will give women and their partners time to come to terms with their loss without having to tap into sick leave. Because their grief is not a sickness, it is a loss. And loss takes time.”
I can personally relate to this experience. I have endured four pregnancy losses, and each time, I returned to work after exhausting my sick leave, often before I felt ready. It’s reported that one in four pregnancies ends in loss, which means in a workplace like mine—with hundreds of employees—there is likely at least one woman grappling with this experience at any moment. Some losses are medically intense; I faced two ectopic pregnancies that threatened my life, one leading to emergency surgery and the other requiring a drug commonly used in cancer treatment. I also endured a “missed miscarriage” and the loss of my son, Oliver, in the second trimester, which involved yet another surgery and severe post-traumatic stress.
Even in the absence of severe medical complications, the emotional toll of pregnancy loss is significant. A major study on the psychological effects of early pregnancy loss found that 29% of women experienced post-traumatic stress one month after their loss. Further, nearly one in four reported moderate to severe anxiety, and about ten percent faced moderate to severe depression. Research indicates that parents who experience stillbirth are at a much higher risk for emotional disorders, including depression, anxiety, and even suicidal thoughts.
This is where I find myself at odds with New Zealand’s new law: three days of leave simply isn’t sufficient.
While I appreciate the progress being made, I can’t shake my disappointment. Three days is a mere gesture rather than a genuine solution.
- Three days is inadequate to process the heart-wrenching news of losing a baby.
- Three days doesn’t allow enough time for recovery from emergency surgeries.
- Three days falls short for healing after giving birth to a stillborn.
- Three days is not enough time to plan a memorial or to navigate the emotional aftermath.
Some may argue that “it’s better than nothing,” similar to the way six weeks of maternity leave is considered “better than nothing.” But we must aim higher than just “better than nothing.” We should not measure women’s health policies against inadequacy.
Other countries have set a higher standard. For instance, India provides six weeks of leave for women after a miscarriage or medical termination. Vietnam offers between 10 to 50 days of partially paid leave based on how far along the pregnancy was, and in Korea, the duration of leave after a miscarriage or stillbirth is proportionate to the weeks of pregnancy, all while ensuring the leave is paid and job security is maintained.
The absence of such policies in the U.S. raises questions about our claim to being the greatest country. Lawmakers, let’s strive to do better. Let’s exceed what New Zealand has implemented and champion support for women and their partners as they navigate the profound grief of losing not just a child, but hopes and dreams as well.
If you’re interested in more insights and resources on this topic, be sure to check out this blog post, which offers additional perspectives. For those seeking authority on home insemination, Make a Mom is a fantastic resource. Additionally, for comprehensive support regarding pregnancy and fertility treatments, visit March of Dimes.
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