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Trigger warning: child loss, suicide
On Mother’s Day this year, I found myself reflecting on the heartfelt cards my children have made for me throughout the years. For many, this day is a joyful celebration, but for a grieving mother, it serves as a painful reminder of the life that once was and can never be again.
I still cherish two handmade Mother’s Day cards from May 2012. One is from my oldest child, Kyle, who was seven at the time, and the other from my youngest, Noah, who was just six. Noah’s card, featuring his handprint as a flower and the sweet note that he loves me because “you sent me to school,” was given to me only seven months before his life was cut short in his first-grade classroom at Sandy Hook Elementary School.
In the aftermath, I have committed my life to safeguarding children from gun violence, striving to ensure that no other parent has to endure the heartache I face daily. However, we must be more vigilant than ever. The pandemic has exacerbated mental health issues among our youth, leading to increased rates of depression and anxiety.
We may assume that children are resilient, but the reality is — they are not okay. As we acknowledge Mental Health Awareness Month, let’s remember the most vulnerable among us: our children. Recent studies reveal that over 70% of teenagers are grappling with mental health challenges, with one in four contemplating suicide. It is a heartbreaking truth that suicide is the second leading cause of death among teenagers, but it is preventable.
In the past year, the National Crisis Center of our Say Something Anonymous Reporting System has reported a significant uptick in student reports concerning suicidal thoughts, self-harm, abuse, and bullying. Alarmingly, over 20% of these reports are classified as life-threatening situations.
Providing students with opportunities to express their feelings and foster new social connections will be essential for their well-being as they transition back to classrooms. It is also crucial for students, educators, and parents to recognize the warning signs of someone at risk of harming themselves or others and know when to seek help.
In honor of mothers everywhere, I urge parents, educators, and compassionate adults to take action for our children’s future. We must implement the necessary support systems as we prepare for the upcoming school year.
My organization, Safe Haven Promise, is making significant strides in protecting children in schools across the nation, yet there is still much work to be done. Evidence-based training in suicide and violence prevention can equip our students to cope with the pandemic’s effects and ongoing mental health issues. The recently reintroduced STANDUP Act in the U.S. Senate aims to make this critical training available to all middle and high schools nationwide, with many programs offered at no cost to school districts.
Despite the political divide, the STANDUP Act passed unanimously in the House of Representatives and is now receiving bipartisan support in the Senate. This is an actionable step we can take today to assist those who need it most: our kids.
After losing my dear Noah, I was engulfed in disbelief. As a mother, the thought of never seeing him again or hearing his joyful laughter was unfathomable. Even in the wake of his tragic passing, I found it hard to accept reality. It took months before I stopped instinctively calling him for dinner or checking my rearview mirror to ensure his seatbelt was fastened.
We must act now to prevent more mothers from experiencing this profound sorrow. Let’s not allow politics to obstruct our children from receiving life-saving support. It is essential that we put aside partisan differences and unite — regardless of party affiliation — to safeguard our children’s future.
The warning signs are evident for the upcoming school year — our children require our help. As they return to the classroom, they need increased mental health resources in place. Time is of the essence, and only the actions we take today can help protect their future.
Please reach out to your U.S. Senators and advocate for the STANDUP legislation aimed at reducing youth suicide. Collaborate with your schools to ensure adequate mental health supports are established before the start of the new school year.
Take action today, so that fewer mothers have to grieve over cards from children lost to violence or despair.
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Summary
This heartfelt piece emphasizes the urgent need for mental health support for children, especially in the wake of increased struggles during the pandemic. The author, who lost her son at Sandy Hook, advocates for the STANDUP Act to provide life-saving training in schools. She calls on parents, educators, and lawmakers to unite and prioritize the safety and well-being of children.
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