From The Confessional: Camping? No Thanks, We're Good!

Okay, fellow parents who adore camping—can you help me understand? I appreciate nature, the fresh air, and the delightful aroma of a campfire just like anyone else, but after a long day of hiking, roasting hot dogs, and indulging in s’mores while sipping a cold drink by the fire, I need the comfort of a real bed, a proper house, and indoor plumbing. Honestly, nothing beats the feeling of waking up at 2 a.m. and realizing you need to pee, only to remember you’re out in the wild and might encounter a bear or walk through a spider web on your way to find a bathroom. No, thank you!

And then you throw kids into the mix! They need to pee at all hours, drop marshmallows into the fire, get stung by bees, or traipse through mud and drag it into the tent. They complain about being too cold, too hot, too loud, too quiet, or just miss their iPads. (And honestly, I’m right there with them. Why are we doing this again?)

Camping is just not for me.

But I know plenty of families who live for camping trips. Maybe you’re one of them—thriving on sleepless nights in a tent, waking up at dawn with back pain, and fending off mosquitoes. If that’s your thing, then more power to you! I prefer my air conditioning, fresh toilet paper, and binge-watching Netflix, thank you very much. Just send me some pictures of your adventures! hugs

I should really be packing for our upcoming camping trip, but instead, I’m here watching a show, sipping a drink, and munching on popcorn. Honestly, camping is not my ideal getaway. I can just as easily cook, clean, and chase after kids in the comfort of my own home.

Confession #25834518: No matter what anyone says, camping is NOT a vacation! At least not for me.

Confession #16655645: My partner thinks we should make camping a regular activity. Absolutely not! I refuse to drag this circus on the road and complicate everything in a space that’s a fraction of what I have at home. No, just no.

Confession #25826007: My boyfriend and my daughter are coming back from a five-day camping trip tomorrow. I wish I could have had a do-over and spent those days relaxing in bed. I feel like I wasted five days of my life. Ugh.

Confession #1747287: Camping is a ton of work. Tired parents of young kids often return home dirtier, more exhausted, and with more bug bites than when they left. That’s the opposite of a vacation!

We just got back from a weekend camping trip with the kids. My partner lounged around while I managed the unloading and organization of the car with the kids. He kept telling me to let them handle it, but he didn’t help with packing or unpacking at all. So frustrating!

Confession #20550997: My partner thinks it’s my fault I didn’t enjoy another camping trip. Yes, cooking over an open fire, boiling water for dishes, lacking a shower, and sleeping on the ground while he went fishing was a blast. Thanks, really.

Confession #25666800: Year after year, we go camping at the same time. Why is it that every year he’s unprepared? He has all year to get organized, and then gets mad at me for having a timeline. Sorry, I can’t help you!

Confession #25636083: We’re leaving for a week-long camping trip tomorrow. I’ve done the shopping, packing, and sorting, and still need to clean. Meanwhile, my partner is researching compound interest rates. Thanks for the backup, buddy.

And if you have a partner who doesn’t contribute and only adds to the chaos, camping goes from bad to a nightmarish experience!

I can’t even poop without my phone! Here I am, camping, and I’m afraid to take it into the porta-potty. Guess I just won’t go—score?

Confession #15091603: During a camping trip with scouts, I peed in a ziplock bag filled with paper towels because the bathroom was too far away.

Confession #16290394: I genuinely admire people who take their kids camping. I wish I could enjoy it, but I can’t stand the lack of a bathroom, personal space, and sleeping on the ground.

Here’s the deal—how can you call it a vacation when there’s no running water or a decent toilet? Or if there is a toilet but you have to trek through rough terrain to get there, carrying your own toilet paper? A basic vacation requirement is having a proper place to relieve yourself without going outside!

Why do people like camping? It’s hot, there are bugs and snakes everywhere. I just don’t get it! Everyone where I live seems to love it—yuck!

Confession #25784805: For our 20th anniversary, I want to go to Portland and enjoy shopping and good food, but my partner insists on camping in the mountains. Absolutely not! I’m a city person. Camping and the wilderness can take a hike!

Confession #22239292: I genuinely don’t see the appeal of camping as a vacation. How can something less comfortable than your home be considered a vacation?

Honestly, camping is just not for me. To all the camping enthusiasts out there, enjoy! You can have my spot on the ground because this momma doesn’t do tents. Unless by “tent” you mean a cabana by the pool with a margarita in hand—then count me in! But with rain, freezing temperatures, sweltering heat, bugs, and no fresh coffee or bathroom facilities, it’s a hard no for me. My husband and kids can go have their fun while I stay home, enjoy the peace and quiet, and relish a dry pillow, hot coffee, and a total lack of bears. Being called “not fun” is a small price to pay for that comfort.

Poor me, right?

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Summary: The author humorously critiques the camping experience, particularly from a parent’s perspective, highlighting the challenges of camping with children and the lack of conveniences that make it feel less like a vacation. While acknowledging the appeal of camping for some, she firmly prefers the comforts of home over the struggles of outdoor living.