As a Boston native, I recently relocated to a Tampa suburb in search of more sunshine, both literally and metaphorically. The combination of a pandemic, a divorce, and a health scare led me to a life-altering decision that I couldn’t ignore.
Now, I’m residing in a town I had never even heard of just a few months ago. I initially made an offer on a different home without seeing it first, a bold move that ultimately didn’t work out. Thankfully, that decision prompted me to board a plane and explore my options.
On that trip, one house welcomed me with an extraordinary presence of butterflies. It was a feeling I had never experienced in my 48 years; it was as if I had finally found my true home. I felt inspired to write a letter to the family of the previous owner to express how this home resonated with me and my journey through grief.
To the family of the woman who owned my new home,
The moment I stepped into your beloved mom’s stunning home, I knew it was meant for me. The soaring ceilings, unique layout, architectural charm, and serene pool left a lasting impression, but it was the small butterfly decal on the sliding glass door that truly captivated me. As I approached to examine it more closely, I was greeted by brilliant butterflies dancing in the backyard, making their presence felt.
It sent chills down my spine, and here’s why.
Before my mom passed away from ovarian cancer in 2013, I asked her how she would let me know she was with me after she was gone. “I’ll send butterflies,” she replied, tears in her eyes.
Sadly, I didn’t see a single butterfly for over a year after her passing. One day, overwhelmed with grief, I drove to a butterfly sanctuary, yearning for a sign. That sign finally appeared when I entered your mom’s home, almost eight years after my mother’s untimely departure.
My mom had a deep love for butterflies; she read extensively about them, traveled to places like Costa Rica and the Galapagos in search of them, and frequently spoke of them. A butterfly is even etched on her grave. I know she is with me now, celebrating my brave choice to move to Florida with my kids and start anew.
My children have also faced profound loss. They both lost their father to kidney cancer in 2018, and my bonus daughter lost her mom to breast cancer when she was just four. Together, we have navigated immense loss but strive to live in hope, inspired by my mother’s resilience.
When I read your heartfelt note after closing, I felt the fresh pain you are experiencing. My mother’s death left a gaping hole in my heart; I have never been the same since. She was my unwavering source of light in a sometimes dark world, my biggest cheerleader as I pursued my dreams, and a nurturing grandmother to my children. The words you used to describe your mom resonated deeply with me; I often use those same words to reflect on my own.
I can only imagine how difficult it was to pack up your mom’s belongings, trusting that her home would be cherished. I want you to know that I will fill it with love, laughter, children, and hopefully grandchildren in the future, just as she did. You are always welcome to visit us.
I’ll leave you with my mom’s favorite quote, which rings especially true in times of grief: “Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly.” I promise to keep your mom’s butterfly decal in my home as a tribute to her and my mother.
My upcoming children’s book, Goodnight Star, Whoever You Are, releases on October 26, coinciding with Children’s Grief Awareness Day.
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In summary, my journey to my new home has been filled with emotions and signs that my mom is still with me. I am dedicated to honoring her legacy and creating a warm, loving environment for my family.
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