I can hardly believe that my children are returning to school in just a week. The summer has flown by, and here I am, organizing school supplies, cleaning out backpacks, and attending orientation sessions. My inbox is overflowing with emails about bus routes, new policies, and reminders. The carefree days of summer are quickly giving way to another academic year filled with uncertainty.
In previous years, I was diligent about tracking my kids’ grades and staying in touch with their teachers. This year, however, I plan to take a step back from the academic pressure. After all that we’ve experienced over the past year and a half, it’s clear that our children’s mental health and overall wellbeing are what truly matter. This school year, I intend to minimize the academic demands and focus on ensuring my kids are genuinely doing well.
Both we and our children have faced significant challenges. From hybrid learning models to debates over masks and vaccines, the confusion has been overwhelming. Teachers, many of whom are also parents, have taken on the role of unsung heroes, navigating this storm of expectations without preparation.
This past year has shown us that teaching is a difficult job, and many parents got a glimpse of the immense workload teachers carry. Most of us were ready to quit that role we didn’t even sign up for!
With this knowledge, I want to remind fellow parents: this year, we need to ease up. The most crucial aspect of our children’s development isn’t their academic achievements or test scores. They haven’t fallen behind; they simply need compassion and understanding. Who are they falling behind? We should extend grace to our kids who have endured a traumatic situation, and recognize that teachers deserve the same empathy.
I hope we’ve learned that our children’s mental, emotional, and physical wellbeing takes precedence over grades. They need to understand that prioritizing rest over homework, and social interaction over perfect grades, is essential. It’s our job to model this mindset, encouraging them to do their best while also providing support. Striving for excellence shouldn’t come at the cost of their wellbeing.
Now, before you message me about how this is easy for younger kids but not for high schoolers, I understand your concerns. Yes, preparing older children for life after high school is important. As a former college instructor, I’ve seen many students struggle when their parents overly catered to their needs, while others thrived due to proper preparation. However, if we only prepare them for academic success, we risk neglecting their mental health. I’ve seen brilliant students break down under pressure, proving that academic success alone is not enough.
By taking a step back and reducing stress, we’re teaching our kids to do the same. Ignoring the emotional toll of pandemic schooling is neither healthy nor productive. We’ve all felt the weight of the last few years; our children feel it too, especially when they’re expected to wear masks for hours while learning. The pandemic has brought us all to an unprecedented place, and it’s vital to acknowledge the highs and lows of this experience.
Yes, the pandemic has required us to be more adaptable than ever, but pushing ourselves and our kids to the brink isn’t sustainable. What if we all agreed to do the bare minimum, allowing space for creativity, rest, and grace? Imagine if, instead of constant demands, we offered understanding at every turn.
I hope this school year becomes a memorable and joyful experience for my children—and yours as well. I want my kids to recognize that their overall health is more important than their grades. I believe this can happen if we, as parents, lead by example.
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In summary, this year, I’m shifting my focus from academic pressure to prioritizing my children’s mental health and overall wellbeing. We’ve all endured enough stress; it’s time to cultivate an environment where our children can thrive without the burden of unrealistic expectations.
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